One word? When seven would do…

2005, the best of times, the worst of times…

This year has cemented for me that Home Education is the right choice for our family. It has proven itself to me over and over again in watching my own children, the other children I know who are Home Educated and also the children I know who attend school. Listening to education in the news and talking to parents has confirmed what I think I had already felt that education is not something that can be seperated from any other area of development or indeed life in general. I have been as educated as the children this year, I have probably learnt more this year alone than in all my years in school I’ve learnt is that there are no experts on Home Ed it has been nice to speak with confidence on the subject and know that I have actually helped or inspired.

The various camps and get togethers have been huge highlights of this year for me too. I can hardly believe that this time last year I had only met a handful of the bloggers briefly in London and was still looking forward to meeting everyone properly at Melrose. Melrose, Kessingland, Hesfes, Okehampton and indeed our own Halloween party attended by a lot of our HE friends were fantastic experiences for all of us. There were times when they were a process (to nick a phrase or concept from Joyce!) too but one which I am glad we underwent.

The beginning, and indeed the end of WAG – the local Home Ed group was a steep learning curve. Again one which I am glad I participated in and one which I am still evaluating what I learnt from. I would not even go so far as to say it is something which I would never do again as I still think it could have been something better than it was, but for now I can see other priorities for my time and energy. I am keen to get more involved with a couple of the other local-ish groups in 2006 and see whether there is scope for bringing one in particular slightly further in this direction geographically while remaining under the umbrella of their organisation – after all, why reinvent the wheel eh – unless it’s got educational value as an experiment! 😉

It’s been a milestone year in particular for Davies who would have started school this September. By now he would have been entrenched in the institutionalisation that that would have brought, dressing like 100s of other children for 5/7 of his week, asking all his questions of someone else and be used to being known as one of a number rather than the individual he so clearly still is. I can think of nothing about that to mourn the loss of really and as yet neither can he. Long may that remain! Educationally he is probably about where he would be in school anyway, he has the rudiments of reading and is starting to spell out words, he knows all his letters and numbers and is experimenting with adding and subtracting as he goes through daily life. He can write quite well – either copying or with me telling him which letter to write next, so literacy and numeracy are probably about on track anyway. Rest of his life wise he has grown up a bit this year, aside from occassional bouts of clinginess there is very little trace of the baby he once was or indeed the very needy toddler he was. He is now a ‘real boy’ and in the company of other small boys he exhibits all the classic behaviours he would be showing in a playground! He is sensitive and has a very strong sense of fairness and justice. He still adores his films and plays games inspired by them for hours, he loves drawing and is getting more and more proficient on the pc or the laptop although x box and PS are still a bit beyond his comprehension. ;-). This year he has gained skills in making friends and has clear friendships with a cluster of boys and girls who he would choose to spend time with over and above others, fortunately I like all their parents too! 🙂

Scarlett is pretty much on track at just three for where I imagined she’d be back when she was just two. She continues to be independant, charming, bright and challenging! I actually think Home Education is equally as right for her as it is for Davies but for rather different reasons. She is a very different child to him and would offer a challenge to any teacher or educator in that she is headstrong and not only is unprepared to fit into a mould she would likely throw it across the room and stamp on it if you tried. A school environment would have one of two effects on her – she would either be marked out as disruptive and indeed live up to that tag, or she would be crushed, brought into line and have her spirit broken until she conformed. One of the things I have always most celebrated about their children is their uniqueness, their ‘Daviesness’ and ‘Scarletticity’ and I never want that to change. She is also very into her drawing and creates recognisable representations of things with very accurate colouring in. She has learnt to copy letters to ‘write’ and does so very neatly and precisely. She can recognise various letters already and the sounds they make, she can also recognise a few letters and count reliably to 10 and with assistance into the teens. She is very articulate and has a large vocabulary which she uses to full effect! She also has a good imagination and is often to be found playing either with Davies in one of their pretend worlds or playing alone with her dolls. She enjoys resources like jigsaws, plastic animals and building toys such as blocks and sticklebricks. She likes things like beads to thread and her fine motor skills are sufficiently developed that she can do a fair job on painting her own nails! 😉 She has also in the last few months started to view other children as playmates and there are three or four particular little girls who she adores and speaks often of so I hope the importance of girlie friendships is being covered for her without the regular contact of school.

It would be very easy to fret about failing the children in some ways with the autonomous route we’ve chosen for Home Education. I sometimes do struggle in observing them and seeing that they are clearly both bright and could well be hothoused to academic success. Should I be pushing them to achieve more faster and using the ‘advantage’ of one-to-two ‘schooling’ that so many people percieve to be a plus for HE? I am still inclined to think that if they do have genius potential in any area then it will out itself and they will be asking to be pushed really, I look at the mathematical or musical prodigies we have amoung our number and realise that it is the children asking for yet harder maths puzzles to solve or pushing for more challenging pieces of music to practise. I hope I pay enough heed to the children to recognise when they are asking and provide accordingly, for now I can’t hear them asking for any more than I am offering.

So that’s my educational round up of the year – it’s been a good one!

I don’t really have any specific goals for next year. I think we have as many resources already as we can afford, store and are likely to need so no wish list there; I think we are already covering the socialising and mixing and mingling very well; I think they are probably both on track to be at reading and writing levels age appropriate just be carrying on as we are and I think by the popularity of Christmas gifts which involve imaginative play, arts and crafts or team games and competition we already have our recipe for life and learning mapped out for us. If we do get looked up by the LEA then I am happy that we have rudimentary plans in place for an Ed Phil, my blog posts to review and pull out evidence of basic education to hand and happy, healthy, intelligent children to demonstrate the success of our choices. Of course this could all change and by February you could be reading my blog post pondering which elements of the Sonlight catalogue to save up for. 😉

So, the rest of the year has been a bit of a blur really. Our lives seem to be, and infact are, very busy. We seem to have plans every weekend, at least four things scheduled in for every week and to have been away from home for many many nights during the year – the overnight bag now has it’s own toothbrushes and toiletries packed at all times! We have been to Scotland, Dorset, Devon, Cornwall, Suffolk, Berkshire (several times!), Yorkshire, Cambridgeshire, Cheshire, Warwickshire, Wiltshire, West Middlands and probably more besides. And I love it! 🙂

This year has definitely been the year that I have found some of the best friends I have ever known. Most of them are through Home Education in some way although we do still have friends who are not in that circle. We have felt accepted, loved, wanted and important and shared some tears and much laughter with people who I hope I will know for the rest of my life. It has been a priviledge to be a support to friends in need and an honour to have friends there for us in our own times of trouble. I hope 2006 is a better year for us all and there are many more happy times ahead of us to share. There have also been learning curves and casualties in that virgin territory of making and developing friendships and I think I will always carry a bitter taste as a result. I have realised that with friendship comes a certain level of responsibility and that for some people playground mentalities still remain. They do not for me and perhaps the only lesson to be learnt there is to ensure that others realise the level of honesty they are subject to and are aware that there is no more or less to my personality than what they are seeing infront of them and they either like that or they don’t. And if they don’t there are ways of dealing with that as an adult!

Ady and I have had what I suppose could have been considered testing times this year although they have not felt testing and have actually brought us closer together than ever. I know I speak for us both (which I frequently find myself doing 😉 ) when I say that our sheer amazement and joy at having found each other and being able to share our lives with each other is something we both wonder at frequently. We end this year more determined than ever to ensure that our priorities of enjoying our lives, our children and every opportunity we can grab are met in the coming year and beyond. Sometimes having nothing to lose can be a very positive state to start from and hey, money can’t buy you love!

I think this year has been very experimental for me in some ways – I entered it with life still categorised for me as areas of my own life and personality and feeling that perhaps the balance was not quite right in some areas. I end the year feeling that Nic is more than the sum total of mother, wife, friend, job title, daughter, educator and that actually in the same way that I have decided the children do not receive an ‘upbringing’ or an ‘education’ they are simply ‘living’ perhaps I really am just ‘Nic’. For that I am feeling slightly less torn and tugged in different directions and able to see how actually several areas of life can be made better all at once. I have some plans, I have some ideas, I have some more dreams. If they happen you’ll know about it, if they don’t then they were not meant to and I won’t mourn for them anyway.

So there you go, tragedy or lottery win aside I can’t see how my state of mind will be much altered really. I’m happy. Next year will no doubt brinlg it’s own challenges and chances – hope I get dealt lots of interesting ones and I hope I am able to recognise them when they come a-calling and grab them with both hands!