One word? When seven would do…

I’d booked Davies and Scarlett into a Pulborough Brooks event this morning called ‘Hiss, slither, hop and croak’ about reptiles and amphibians. I wasn’t sure if it was a staying with them or a kids only one as I booked it ages ago but they were whisked away while I was completing one of those ‘I give you full responsibility to do whatever you want with my precious babies and promise not to sue you if you only give me one or part of one both back at the end of it’ forms.

This was not ideal as it didn’t give me time to a) get their coats from the car and give them to them or b)negotiate not staying on the premises for the full 2 hours. If the weather had been okay I’d have walked round the reserve but it was bucketing down and would have simply been an exercise in stamina and misery. Having said I’d stay around I felt duty bound to do so ‘just in case’ so took myself and the book I’d thought to grab at the last minute to the cafe and lingered over a pot of tea for one, alternating between my book and eavesdropping on all the elderly folk taking morning tea in the cafe – I was the youngest in there by at least 2 generations, if not 3!

I had stuffed the kids’ coats outside the classroom where they were, well Scarlett’s coat, I couldn’t find Davies’ so had shoved my raincoat there on the basis it would be super waterproof by reaching to his ankles, being able to be folded double back to his shoulders on the sleeves and suitable for accomodating at least 3 more children inside 😆 except they had ignored them when they ventured outside to do pond dipping and were standing forlornly, the only un-coat-clad children there fishing newts and frogs out of the pond.I spied them through the window and dashed over to put their coats on them just as one of the volunteers was coming with a couple of skanky lost property coats which Davies was already flatly refusing to have anywhere near him 😆 Having secured my reputation as SlackMom I went back to the cafe and rebelliously ordered another pot of tea and toasted teacake 😆 It might not quite be splashing the child benefit on cheap fags and cooking sherry while my kids go barefoot and coatless but it was close!

I sat outside the classroom for the last 10 minutes when I could no longer nurse my empty cup in the cafe while people queued for tables for lunch and I had exhausted browsing opportunities in the shop of tea towels with robins on, fancy handcream and those soft toy birds that you squash the tummies of so they play birdsong. It all sounded very rowdy in there as the teacher woman attempted to do some sort of round up quiz with them while battling with noisy kids and saying things to them like ‘come on, you need to finish this before you go!’. As the other parents joined me they were also listening in and commenting that it was a bit too classroom-y for kids who are supposed to be on half term holidays and that it seemed pitched a bit high for the age group of 6+. The teacher did look very harrassed when we went in to collect them.

Davies and Scarlett said they’d really enjoyed most of it although they knew quite a lot of the stuff that was covered and said they’d got really fed up with everyone not listening and being noisy. I rather suspect this was a bit of a fabrication as I don’t imagine they were being perfect angels but I did tell them that the bit I’d overheard had been exactly as I remember school being which rather shocked them. Scarlett commented that she’d been surprised that most of the children didnt’ actually seem to want to be there which I guess is different to their usual weekend and evening sessions in places where the children are there because it’s something they enjoy and I wonder if this morning’s session was rather more like holiday childcare in a lot of cases.

Davies said he’d read the quiz, Scarlett said she had no idea what it was so had just checked random answers (it was mulitple choice) although she said Davies had showed her which some of the answers were. We then talked about ways of working out words even if you can’t read them yet by clues of the sounds at beginnings and ends of words which she proved surprisingly good at. We had a very interesting discussion about exactly how the sperm gets to the egg when human babies are created which I kept factual but honest. I imagine we’ll be coming back to that one again and indeed we talked about it again later as I explained that I think that is the sort of information children should learn from their parents rather than other children and that I thought maybe they shouldn’t discuss it with other children incase they didn’t already know. Scarlett demonstrated she had the idea by asking ‘so is a penis like a cannon and the sperm like a cannonball shooting out then?’ which I sincerely hope she doesn’t repeat anywhere else!!!!

We also talked about different parenting styles, what is and isn’t okay from parents to children and vice versa, which other parents they know they think they wouldn’t mind living with and loads of other interesting chats like that. Davies told me he thinks we have our most interesting conversations in the car :).

Davies had an underwear shortage and I decided we should invest in new pacamac style waterproof jackets for them both so we stopped in Littlehampton on the way home. As we got out of the car Davies said ‘but our macs are here’ and reached into the seat pockets to pull them both out – meaning none of my earlier embarrassment had been necessary! We got pants for Davies, a couple of nighties for Scarlett and called into a wool shop where they had loads of 50p bags of ends of balls and balls that had lost their labels so I got enough to finish my scraps blanket hopefully :).

Back home Scarlett got out loads of toys, scattered them about and then got distracted by the tv so had to put them all away again, unplayed with at teatime. She did sit with me for ages all snuggled up too which was nice :). Davies watched some cbbc stuff including Prank Patrol which he adores.

They had tea, Ady came home and we all had to list two things we’d learnt today that we didn’t know when we woke up. Davies’ were that he has learnt that different people see different sides to others or that we bring out different things in people and that toads lay their spawn in a string unlike frogs who lay theirs in a clump. Scarlett said she’d learnt about how sperm meet eggs and how to spell ‘Davies’ (we were writing on the misted up car windows earlier and I challenged them to spell each other’s names). Mine were learning that there is a third snake in the UK aswell as grass snakes and adders called a smooth snake which the kids told me about from this morning and that Truleigh Hill is free for Christmas camp and Ady’s were work related, I know one was to do with excel. The kids really liked that idea and want to do it every evening before stories :).

We read a couple of chapters of George but got distracted by the chickens having a face off with a big fat rat. We watched out of the window as they sort of circled each other and the rat did jump at one of the hens but she held her own and the others all gathered round and saw the rat off. Go chickens!

I watched The Apprentice, Davies lingered even longer than usual over bedtime and insisted I go up to his room when he appeared at about 11pm to show me his exceptionally tidied up bedroom which does look great but I’d rather he did during daylight hours! :rolls:

I don’t want to jinx it but we’re definitely having a better week this week :).