One word? When seven would do…

Is how I feel today. For no particular reason really though.

I don’t feel 100% well but nothing I could put my finger on and I’ve just felt low level irritated by ‘things’ today with that pit of your stomach dread feeling without having any real explanation for it. I do now have a genuine reason for feeling a bit blah, so I’m slightly relieved actually, but I need to dwell on that a bit before airing it – or at least talk to a real person about it and get some face to face feedback about whether it’s an issue or not…

So, we had a Lie In this morning while the children amused themselves watching Wallace and Gromit, which was nice – a taste of Sunday mornings of old and Sunday mornings of the future maybe where there is more of a lazy awakening than a pre-dawn muttering about ‘who’s turn’ it is to get up with the children! 😉

Then we went over to Mum & Dad’s. Dad and Ady went and got some logs, we had lunch, I tried to get Dad to read an article about NC in Home Education Journal which he did in a half hearted, casting his eye over it sort of way before flicking to the front cover, noting the name of the publication and then dismissing it with ‘well you’re going to get a biased view in there aren’t you?’ Silly me for bothering really eh? 🙄

Mum and Dad were complaining about Frazer and Fiona who were there but hiding out in Frazer’s bedroom which is where they spend every weekend – I did try and gently hint that in a fairly new relationship, particularly at their age (30 and 32) they probably wouldn’t be desperate to spend their time with Frazer’s parents, sister and her family really, but I could see their point about it being *their* house and a quick ‘hello’ when she arrives for the weekend on a Friday night and stays until Sunday would be nice rather than sneaking in and not saying a word to them.

Then I looked at some work paperwork for Mum. A bit of a joke really, she is the manager of a charity shop for a local cancer hospice. She’s been there for nearly 8 years and is really good at her job but there were Management Consultants in at her Head Office for much of last year putting together a big shake up and all sorts of very negative (from Mum’s POV) changes have come about as a result. The latest thing she is involved in is a training course which is being run by the Chairman and involves a delegate from every area of the charity – so Mum is representing the Retail section and sits with someone from the Nursing Staff, someone from the office, someone from Fundraising etc. She had these prepared questions to have answered and thought about and was utterly bamboozled by them. I read them and they really wound me up too. Now I know I am fairly exceptional within this circle for not having been educated past A levels and although I don’t think ‘missing out’ on university did me any great harm I would be very happy if D or S end up going for all sorts of reasons, not least educational ones. But this document was a classic example of Education Over Intelligence – which I came upon several times in my career in Retail, Recruitment and Marketing. I know I can be a great one for using many more words than I need to and using 3 sentences when two words would do the same job but this document was a joke. Not only was it over wordy it was also just full of buzz words, information that was not particularly valid or pertinent and in some places simply didn’t make a lot of sense. It appeared to be copied in chunks from some sort of How to be a Manager type book and was largely just tosh!

I put it back into plain English for Mum – assured her that yes of course she could give ‘working examples of a project she has project managed’ and fulfil all of the criteria for ‘giving examples for each characteristic of project management and explaining why they were important’. The way she tells it the last few of these training sessions have been more an exercise in making staff feel unworthy of their roles and chipping away at their confidence. I was torn between telling her to go in there and explain that actually her 3 year old granddaughter is a ‘project manager’ and give working examples of how she manages a project such as going for a poo including delegation for arse wiping, getting the correct tools for the job by tracking down her stool to reach to climb up to the loo, preparing for her task by pulling down her pants and communicating her needs by yelling ‘MummmmmmEEEEEEEE’ when she’s done. You get the picture. Or by running her up a powerpoint presentation to take in there using more long words than even this document did and wowing them back with her own ability for spin (well mine really, but she could demonstrate delegation along with it!). So that irritated me on various levels too, including on her behalf. 🙁

Scarlett has been a right handful today too, including biting Davies hard enough to pierce his skin. And then she lied about it. 🙁 She has this imaginary ‘friend’ who she calls her ‘special man’ who she insists lives in the loft in her bedroom (there isn’t one!). Now previously Special Man has not really been blamed for anything serious – he occassionally is held responsible for unexplained mysteries such as eating the last biscuit, moving keys or dummies and so on. But today she blamed him for biting Davies, despite there being a couple of witnesses to the contrary. She eventually confessed but of course it made the original misdemeanour even worse. She continued to be challenging once back at home and although we sorted it out by bedtime I see her spending a fair amount of time in her room this week if she continues like this. She is really hard to come down tough on as she pulls off charming and contrite really well but is back being dreadful again within moments of promising she is really really sorry. Ah well.

Anyway, the positive side of today!

Dad had some frogspawn in his pond which we have brought home to watch and keep fingers crossed at least some makes it to the next stage. We dug out a book about frogs life cycles and read that (me and Davies, while Tarly was banished to her room) and then Davies re-‘read’ it to Tarly again. Certainly not word perfect as he was not reading it but he had the gist of it within one reading which I thought almost as impressive as being able to read it really! 🙂

Davies has done lots of drawings this weekend, he likes to draw with pens and is far too busy to be colouring in his creations – which is so opposite to me as a child when I would revel in the complete creation with full glorious technicolours – it’s as though he has so many images in his mind and this pressing urgency to commit them all to paper as quick as possible. He is practising writing totally of his own accord – mainly Wallace and Gromit but he appears to have all but conquered writing those words without copying them any more and I note plenty of ‘Davies’ written everywhere too. I think I have speculated before that it might just be his desire to write that prompts his need to read.

Anyway, my not feeling right has finally morphed into a Where the Days Go style affliction so I’ll finish here and hope my stomach recovers and Special Man doesn’t get up to any mischief in the night!

Over to Chris and Julie’s today where we left Chris and Ady with the children and Julie and I went to the Chichester NCT nearly new sale together. We managed to be very ladylike about the fact we were both searching in the girls 3-4 years area for Maisie and Scarlett although as they have different colouring and tastes in clothes it would probably be rare we’d select the same item for them both anyway. She bought loads more than me anyway, particularly as I really don’t need any more clothes for Tarly atm. I got her two summer dresses and three jumpers/fleece tops for Davies, an ELC Monkey business game that Freya has and Davies liked and a brand new wooden labyrinth. Oh and two Bible books (The Easter Story and The Good Samaritan) and a make paper animals by cutting them out of the book and glueing them together. All for a tenner 🙂 The game had already been played with loads this afternoon, as has the labyrinth, which is numbered with holes 1-45 so must have some great maths value too. 🙂

We went back to their’s for lunch, where all the children were playing out in the garden and then went off to a local farm for a lambing weekend. It was possibly slightly oversold and the fact it was so cold and so windy made us less likely to stop and gaze in wonder at nature so beautifully presented before our very eyes and more likely to have a quick look at the animals and move swiftly onto the next ones. There were rabbits, guinea pigs and rats to stroke, a hen with very new chicks to pet, lambs and piglets to stroke, cows and horses to feed and so on. The children did enjoy it but were as keen as us to keep moving so we were only there about an hour. There was a shetland pony giving pony and trap rides but it was just too cold to queue or ride so we said goodbye to Julie and came home via McDonalds.

We had a couple of games of Monkey Business and then I went to Sainsburys to get next week’s food shopping while Ady bathed the children. An early night for both of them (D was awake past 10pm last night which is really late for him and they were both up before 7am today) and I think we are fairly inclined to follow suit sometime in the next half hour or so ourselves.

one of those healthy ones with carrots and bran and crap in which don’t even really deserve to be called muffins with all the chocolate chip if American or dripping with melted butter if English type loveliness it summons up.

Someone should probably come and rescue me actually before I succumb utterly to housewifelyness and start dusting my skirting boards, creating a rota for tasks such as sock darning (currently if they have a hole they go in the bin, unless Ady is wearing them in which case they last until I chuck them in the thrice yearly Goddard sock cull), washing of the nets (we don’t do nets. This was once a catch phrase of mine in a workplace of long ago before children where a middle aged spinster lady who lived nearby with her parents was utterly horrified, but secretly titilated, by the fact that we often wonder naked round the house despite not having nets! So I’d need to buy some, nay, make some for the purpose of washing them) and sorting the spice rack into alphabetical order. So if anyone wants to come get me (on a bus obviously!) with emergency supplies of wine, attitude, a T shirt bearing the slogan ‘I read Twisty!’ and armfuls of Germaine Greer books then please feel free! 😉

So let’s get it over with first shall we? Today I made curry and pilau rice as from scratch as you can without rearing the chicken from an egg and then slaughtering it yourself and picking the rice from paddy fields. I also made some choux buns (and Katy I promise I am not recipe stalking you, we made them once before – we have the same first cookbook as you – and the kids were desperate to make ’em again). And they all turned out well but I’ll brag about my frugal genius elsewhere! 😳

Scarlett has been a ‘challenge’ today but I had a feeling yesterday that she might be on the cusp of ‘going down with something’ and I retain that thought today so I’ll let her off. Davies OTOH has been a perfect child to the point of inspiring me to write some sort of raising children manual such would my confidence in my perfect mothering ability be if I didn’t have Tarly (and a full two years worth of blog archives!) to prove me wrong! I heart Davies lots today!

Ady left around 7am and I had full intentions of getting up but somehow the next thing I knew it was 8am and the doorbell was ringing. I suspected it to be my Dad but it was actually Ady who had not gone off to work as I suspected but headed off to Asda as an online search had shown them to be selling the cheapest Guinness so he’d gone off there for some St Patricks Day supplies and returned home to get them in the chiller ready for this evening. I stayed up and started making the curry and indeed within about half an hour my Dad did arrive so I sat and chatted to him for a bit while Davies played with the straw art kit. He’d got the scissors out and cut up some of the straws to construct some bits and pieces while Scarlett played with her soft toys.

We ended up (surprise!) leaving in a rush so left the lounge strewn with stuff and dashed out to meet Julie at the potential venue for a new HE group. It took just 10 minutes to drive to although it would unfortunately be a bit of a bugger for public transport I suspect 🙁 Other than that though (and let’s face it with a bit of cooperation collecting people from stations should be fairly feasible) it seems ideal. It’s an excellent space with chairs and tables and lots of lovely natural light, it has a shared garden with an on site nursery which with careful management and some relationship building could be a real bonus. The room itself is actually a converted barn detached from the main building which is where the toilets and kitchen are which has obvious fors and againsts but at least it negates the possibility of kids hanging round the loos turning the taps on full blast and getting underfoot in the kitchen. The kitchen also has an oven which we could use for baking 🙂 Julie and I were both impressed enough to decide to go ahead with a trial run so I will get it booked up over the weekend and start advertising it locally. 🙂

We had planned a walk round the lake at Arundel but it had been very cold again here today so we decided to head back into town to soft play instead. Except soft play was closed 🙁 We went to the main library instead where we all chose a book each and generally disturbed the peace before deciding to come back to ours for lunch and a play. This was actually a really good plan for me as I had been cautious about both previous options costing money so that was a result! 🙂 The children ate peanut butter sandwiches – I had warned Julie it would be white sliced bread 😉 and then disappeared off to play while we had a good chat about all things Activeo and new group and so on. They headed off around 2pm and we are seeing them again tomorrow.

Which left an hour during which we made choux buns and the children played before Jean arrived. Jean is the ‘ex’ from Bruce and Jean. Bruce is the friend who recently married Paula. Bruce and Jean are the couple we did loads of things with pre children including going to New York. Ady knew Bruce pre Bruce and Jean but I did not and was delighted when Jean got back in touch a respectable amount of time after the split. We chatted generally and also specifically about the wedding, she is still upset but her broken heart is slowly mending and she was surprised to report that actually she is quite enjoying being single and is loving being independant and not answering to anyone. 🙂 Jean is excellent with the children – she has similar aged grandchildren and also works with learning disability adults with mental ages of under 10s so D & S were delighted with an additional audience of grown ups. We managed lots of chatting and tea drinking (oh and choux bun eating 😉 ) while the children played and then we were all invited to Davies’ room where he had set up a cafe with daily specials delights as Buzz Lightyear Lasange, Drusillas cup dessert and Shaun the sheep spaghetti, all seasoned with wikkistix condiments! So we enjoyed that and then it was time for Jean to head off for single woman Friday night pursuits and the children’s tea. Ady arrived home just as Jean left and we have been celebrating St Patricks Day with Guinness and The Pogues (and shedding a small tear for Kirsty 🙁 ).

Moments of testing today with the small people. Minor irritations all round really; I managed to get fired up about my insurance complaint again by a phonecall from the people who’s invoice hasn’t been paid – so I fired off a 3 page letter complaining and got that in the post, I ended up telling the children that unless they could live together without squabbling then one of them would have to leave – and invited open discussion on who should be the one to leave and why- it was a lot like The Apprentice actually, maybe I should have set them challenges and pitted them against each other properly! 😉

And the h key on my laptop is a bit sticky (probably splashed with wine) which means I am dropping h’s all over the place. This, along with not pronouncing the t’s in the word butter is a big pet hate for me so rest assured if I type were when it should be where it is accidental and will annoy me as much in re-reading as it annoyed you!

We did some Floam-ing first thing. Davies made me laugh loads by exclaiming, hands plunged into the pot ‘the advert is right Mummy. It is fun you can feel!’ 🙂 They seem to like playing with it playdoh style but we did get out the papier mache eggs we made last week and directed me in a couple of zigzag lines round them. We also cut open Davies’ and plan to line it with tissue paper for him to collect any easter eggs he finds in. While doing that we watched Dora and all sang along as it was an episode with a cool song!

After lots of negotiation and a little more ranting we headed off to Sainsburys to buy a few bits. I needed a few herbs and spices for some muffiny pursuits and it’s always such a good idea to take wayward children out to embarrass you in public I find 😉

The children had some lunch and watched our Spider video while I did some very theraputic spice crushing, pounding and grinding! Then Scarlett and I read some Dr Seuss books from the library with Davies half listening and half playing with a kit of straws and plastic connectors to make stuff with. He’s started to follow instructions and copy ideas from books in things like lego, k’nex and so on which was something he’d never do before so that’s a nice development. I don’t want to crush his own imagination and design but it’s good to see him able to transfer what he sees into something he can make.

Then Ali rang to say her and Freya had completed the first and second legs of their journey and actually they were tired and their feet hurt and they had wine so could we go and get them now please! 🙂 so we did!

There was much playing in Tarly’s room today, there was some laying down of the law about space hoppers not in the lounge and I did allow my anal side out to whip the hoover round when it became clear there was more kinder egg than carpet on the floor but Ali and I certainly managed some good chats and the children seemed to enjoy a good play. There was dressing up, bed bouncing and who knows what else but all easily sorted by the kitchen timer tidy up game – which the children completely ignored but Ali and I participated in with vigor! There was spaghetti tea for small people and then Ady arrived home in time to run them back to the station while I bathed children and washed spaghetti and Floam out of their hair.

Davies was lovely all afternoon, one of those occassions when you are just all glowy at how lovely your offspring is. Of course it was shattered again as the door closed behind Ali and he stopped revelling in being the only male in a house with two small giddy girls and two slightly inebriated women all thinking he was fab and morphed back into a rather overexcited, not listening to his mother five year old little boy again. 🙄

Tomorrow we’re off to check out the potential venue for a new local group and then weather permitting we’re going to walk round a lake / feed the ducks at Arundel with Julie, Jack and Maisie.

and she stayed awake all the way home!

We’ve been to the House Of Ros today 🙂

Now Ros’ house is probably the most representative house of it’s owner I think I’ve ever been to. If you know Ros – and even if you only know her online – and you were in that old gameshow ‘Through the keyhole’ and there were 7 houses to choose from then I reckon everyone would guess Ros’ house straight away! 😉 – except of course Ros is polly pocket sized and her house is not! 😉 Other than that it is warm, it has grand bits, it has chaotic bits, it has beautiful bits, it is full of love and it is full of bits of all of the people who live there.

So Ros and I happily sat on her kitchen worktop chatting and recipe swapping (and yes this is Nic, not some impersonator! 😉 ) and discussing parenting and how children can be very very testing at times (see, it is me!) while the children happily got lost and played. Pea did hotdogs for lunch and Tarly made friends with Kessie.

Then we headed over to Eastbourne to a Science week event put on by the ever amazing Let (you know Ros, I’d love to see Let do Wife Swap – it would be so funny to watch anyone else try and achieve half of what she does) which was all set up with loads of science experiments and loads of local Home Educators. Davies played by himself with a skeleton for a while and then happily rampaged round with a gang of lads in balloon related ladism while Tary worked her way round most of the experiments doing them happily and in her own special Tarly-like way! 😉

Davies was persuaded to do a couple of the experiments but was far happier just being social so I left him to it. Some pics:

more on flickr.

As we left Tarly ran out infront of a car chasing her balloon 🙄 which luckily was going very slowly. The bloke driving it very kindly went and resuced her balloon too and brought it back to her making her promise not to run into roads ever again.

Davies and I managed to keep Tarly awake with tic tacs and the Tumble Tots Action Songs cd all the way home in the car, they’ve had tea and are now ready for bed. Ady’s just rung to say he’s had a good day (doing presentations to 60 people at a time all afternoon – it’s gone well apparently and he’s just finished) and is on his way home.

One minor irritation is that I am suffering from itchy eyes with lots of gunk in them – surely it’s too early yet for hayfever, it was snowing earlier this week!

Not a bad day certainly, but a wearing one. Which is sort of a relief as you know you need to pay back a good day like yesterday somehow ;-).

Lucy came round first thing with Rebecca and Richard. Rebecca was not in the best of moods – they moved house yesterday so I think she is slightly unsettled and Scarlett was flatly refusing to share her toys, her room or indeed her brother! So that made for plenty of adult intervention. Eventually Rebecca dissolved into whinging of the loud and parent irritating variety so Lucy plonked her outside in the car so we could finally finish our conversation! But it was one of those wearing mornings when you just keep losing your thread due to constant, for the sake of it, interuptions from the children. 🙄 There were some bright moments of course. Lucy had brought some gingerbread men with icing and sprinkles so the big three sat and did that very happily for half an hour – necessitated a good mid visit hoover true, but worth the peace! 😉 Davies did yet more storyboard style pictures – he’s really got into this and the floor is covered with loads of pages of pictures all telling stories – lovely! 🙂

He also taught himself how to trace. I’d printed out a Wallace and a Gromit mask yesterday but not given them to them. They found them this morning and coloured them in and then Davies realised that if he laid a sheet of plain paper over them the print was bold enough to see through the paper and draw round. Hey presto, autonomous, self-taught tracing! 🙂 I explained about the other sort of tracing with scribbling and tracing paper so we’ll get some next time we are near a suitable retailer. He also drew round some toys in a stencil fashion and then filled in details like faces on them by copying, so loads of art styles and techniques all done via self discovery.

After Lucy had gone we put Fun Radio on Sky and sat down to do some puzzles (me and Tarly) and some geomags (Davies). Unfortunately it was ‘nap time’ so they were playing classical music. I say unfortunately because I’d been hoping for something like a story for them to actively listen to rather than be background noise. It occured to me today that the areas my children are probably most rich in in terms of the resources available and the things which capture them and therefore we cover most are art and music, which is ironic really in many ways, particularly as they would have been the areas I would have felt they could potentially miss out on by not having access to resources at school. There was some conflict with Davies wanting me to ‘only pay attention to him’ as he was doing some sort of recreation of the metamorphasis of Wallace to the Were Rabbit using geomags – which was good admittedly but I think Tarly is entitled to half of my attention for her puzzle making too 🙄

Eventually peace was restored and they returned to playing together so I went off to do some baking. I made various things, some experimental including snickerdoodles – have finally cracked them, but in trying so hard I think I may have snickerdoodled myself out! 😉 I also made chocolate chip rock cakes, fairy cakes and some cup cakes which didn’t work but the kids proclaimed delicious anyway! I had various helpers at various points which was actually quite nice and then I cleared up the kitchen and we all tidied up the lounge together.

Davies had further complaints about me not playing with him enough, which he does do from time to time and can usually be remedied by a little one to one, but doing something I am interested in rather than simply being a captive audience for his geomag constructions for hours on end. We did start to read a Bob book together but he was not really wanting to do it so I suggested he look at his leappad books for a while as some of them have some good pre reading stuff in them. He thought that was a good idea and even suggested which ones would be good for remembering the sounds each letters make so he did that for a while too.

Ady got home just after Tarly fell asleep so I imagine she’ll have a wakeful night to ensure she gets her full daily quota of Daddy!

I had a lovely long lie in this morning until gone 9am, which I really needed after two crap nights and a disturbed night with Tarly last night too, so waking after enough sleep always puts a good spin on the day! 🙂

I then got washed, dried and put away every scrap of dirty washing in the house except for the very last load which is still swinging on the line and can stay there til tomorrow.

I got my printer working again, which is very good as I need to write a complaining letter to my insurance company and I don’t think handwriting it would have been such a great option. Just need to summon up the relevant rage to get that written now – Ali can you help? 😉

The post brought nothing scary and the phone only rang once which was my Dad. This year’s council tax and water rates have both come in now and although they have gone up neither has gone up to the point of buggering up our budget too much – this is good. 🙂

I think I might have found a good venue for a new HE local group – it is slightly over my self imposed budget but only by £2 per hour and it does tick pretty much every box looking at the website, including an outside space and the right location. I’ve been emailing back and forth with the man in charge there and will go and have a look at it later this week to double check and ensure they are happy with the purpose we’d be using it for (I can’t face a repeat of the time I had shocked faces looking at me asking ‘why are these children not in school? Is there something wrong with them?’ at one potential venue.) but it seems to be free pretty much every day which means I can be a bit flexible with when I arrange it for and ensure I am not clashing with anything else that local HE folk attend too.

We had Primary History on for much of the morning although it was not watched too closely so we had a bit of discussion about skin colour which covered history and geography as we talked about different countries too. The children played with geomags and although I had intended to do some reading aloud with them they were so engrossed in their games I ended up sitting reading some more of my book group book. I’ve finished the Looking for JJ one and thought it was pretty good actually. Very readable, very similar to a lot of books I read in my teens and nowhere near as harrowing as I was warned it would be (which might say something dreadful about my shockability actually, but never mind 😉 ) and I’m already forming my views about what I think of the other one, so that will make for a better book group next week I’m sure.

Then Davies requested I did drawing with them instead of reading to them so we got out pens and paper and I drew a W&G picture for them and showed Davies how to copy a style of lettering, so we did that for a while. Their papier mache has dried really well so we’ve popped the balloons inside and need to plug up the hole and add a final layer to smooth them out slightly and cover the newsprint, I’ve said we’ll probably do that tomorrow, maybe with kitchen roll. They are being surprisingly patient and sensible about a project spanning a week or more rather than being able to do it all ‘now’ so that’s good. 🙂

Then my Dad arrived. He came over to look after Tarly while I took Davies to badgers but he arrived a couple of hours early so he sat reading books to Tarly and being very impressed with her looking at 100EL seeing the letters she remembered. 🙂 Davies did a load of pictures loosely based on Were Rabbits using one sheet of paper to illustrate a story as he told it by drawing as he went. Then I told him to do a series of pictures to tell a story so he drew 4 pictures and then told us all the story. I tried to persuade him to do a title page but he was not up for that, he did number them 1-4 though. The children had an early tea which they’ll need to get used to on Mondays and then Davies and I headed off to badgers.

He’d been calling it ‘stupid badgers’ all day and kept checking how many times we’d need to go before he could decide that he didn’t like it and we didn’t need to go anymore so I was not feeling hugely optimistic really but he surprised me and himself by really liking it! 🙂 There are only two more sessions left before the end of term and they are changing over Badger Leaders but both the current and the new leader were there and the new woman is all fired up with loads of great ideas so it would seem a good time to get started really. They are right at the end of Caringwhich they have covered this term and had a midwife in to talk a bit about her job (in as much detail as 5-10 year olds can handle 😉 ). She was the mum of two of the badgers and did all sorts of stuff like taking blood pressure, showing them how to get a vein up for blood tests, listening to the baby’s heartbeat (the new leader’s daughter is pregnant and was there to oblige), listening to their heartbeats, showing them the newborn baby scales and going through various items in a home birth pack. D loved it 🙂 Next week there will be a policeman in to talk and the last week is an end of term party, so he’s really happy at the prospect of both of those.

They explained how the group is quite stuctured, there is not much running around like loons goes on, which is probably for the best really 😉 and that on the weeks when they don’t have a speaker they do things like crafts, telling stories, imaginative games etc – all based round the theme for that term. It sounds excellent 🙂 They have around 12 children most weeks, a balance of boys and girls and all the children there seemed really nice. I was the only parent who stayed and they are happy for me to either stay or not stay – D is not up for me disappearing just yet but I don’t think it would take too many weeks before he was fine with it – there is another room next door where I could always sit and read if it took him longer to settle but it is a minutes drive from home (10 minute walk in the summer) so it’s not a problem to stay or go really. I really liked the firm and gentle way they kept a rein on the children and she was explaining how hot SJA are on child protection and so on, obviously all the children are local and were very welcoming to D, remembering and using his name straight away and making him part of their group. So hurrah, hurrah, hurrah really! 🙂

Ady’s had an appraisal at work today which went very well and he has a massive presentation to the board to do in a couple of weeks which has been hinted today could result in promotion/payrise so that is all very positive.

And finally, Dad brought round two envelopes which arrived in the post for us at his house this morning containing a £50 win for me and a £100 win for Davies on our premium bonds! 🙂

So of course tomorrow is bound to be dreadful, but today? Today is good!

Yesterday was exactly the Saturday a good doctor would have prescribed for me. I’d had a shit week, I’d had enough of being Mummy, enough of being broke and not nearly enough of being Nic. Yesterday I was more Nic than I’ve been in weeks and weeks and it was good! 🙂

And I am still feeling positive on the wrong side of two crap nights’ sleep and no alcohol last night too 😯

Yesterday morning I laid in bed attempting to go back to sleep after a bad night with Tarly in our bed stroking me and cuddling me (all very sweet but not condusive to sleeping really. Around 3am I sat upright, looked down at her all strewn across my pillow where she had been playing with my hair and asked her ‘What are you doing Scarlett?’ Her reply was to look up at me with very wide eyes and say ‘Oh you’re the best Mummy in the whole world Mummy!’. 🙄 Clearly she’s been getting lessons in being endearing from somewhere as like Davies and his ‘shyness’ that would be another quality she’s not inherited from me 😉 So there I was lying reading my book and listening to the noises of Ady and the kids drifting up the stairs when Ady arrived with a cup of tea in bed for me. 🙂 Ah, the weekend!

I then left them all to it and went off to a NCT nearly new sale (as blogged about on buymelove) where I got a load of lovely stuff for Tarly for bargain prices. She’s wearing possibly my favourite item of a fluffy orange top today and looks beautiful (and very HE) in it. I then went over to Tesco to get a cheapo plastic jug with US cup measurements on it, which resulted in a batch of the closest thing to Katy’s snickerdoodles I believe it is possible for me to get 😉 I also used butter rather than stork which seemed to keep the mix firmer and actually I need to shut about about this topic now as it’s not so long ago I blasted people for posting recipes in my comment box is it! 😳

So refreshed from being child-free, shopping, getting bargains and the prospect of a night out enjoying the comedic talent of messers Walliams and Lucas with my lovely husband I returned home for lunch. Scarlett did a mini fashion show for us all with her new clothes (now that she does get from me! 😉 ), we put a Frank Sinatra cd on and all sang and danced along for a bit, then there was a prolonged bathing went on. Ady had one but got hijacked by the children so got out. Then I removed them from the bath for various spitting and splashing offences. Then after some tears and apologies Ady started again with an undisturbed bath while I cut Davies’ hair, then I had a bath which Davies joined me in at the end. Scarlett continued in the fashion show vein and went through about four changes of pjs. 🙄

Then the kids had tea while Ady and I got ready to go out, my parents arrived to look after the children and off we went.

We had excellent seats, five rows back from the front right infront of the stage – close enough to count the body hairs on David Walliams when he stripped naked in the second to final sketch (prime minister’s aide one). It was very funny, not amazing script-wise but with enough ad lib to make you feel you were part of an audience rather than watching them on TV, there were various poor people dragged up on stage which is always fun to witness 😉 and probably the most exciting realisation of the evening came during the interval when I worked out that the couple two rows infront of us looked so familiar was not because I actually knew either of them, it was because they were Maxwell and Saskia off of Big Brother 2005!!!! So they are still together and very loved up, still looking quite chavtastic and clearly not doing well enough out of being ex BB ‘stars’ to afford any better seats than we could! ;-). End of.

We remained in budget for the evening by getting a KFC on the way home which we sat in the car in the town centre of one of the towns between here and Brighton and ate, watching the ‘yoof’ marauding around and speculating on how long it was since we were the ones spending Saturday night like that and how long it might be before our own children are doing it…

This morning we’ve been off to a car boot sale braving the mud. There were far fewer people around although we were probably a half hour later arriving than last week and we didn’t find anything for Davies. We got two polly pocket playsets again for Scarlett – this time a 101 Dalmations one and a Beauty & the Beast castle. Both utterly filthy and incomplete with lots of figures missing, but they cleaned up fine with an old toothbrush and some baby wipes and at 80p for the pair I think we did rather well! 🙂

Ady started cooking roast to have at lunchtime instead of dinnertime so the children could try some (Nigella’s ham in coca cola), the children settled down to play on the pc on Nick jr – Scarlett and following the dvd extras instructions on W&G to make plasticine figures – Davies, while I made my list of shopping for this weeks menus and popped up to Sainsburys.

We’ve now had a lovely lunch followed by apple and cinnamon crumble and cream (me, being muffiny again 😉 ), Davies has gone back to his plasticine, Ady is reading stories to Tarly and that Sunday afternoon feeling that I don’t recall having since childhood after a big lunch when really you should galvanise yourselves into going for a brisk walk or something has overcome the whole house.

Ady and I did lots of talking last night about all sorts of stuff – money, work, where we live and so on including a bit about HE – which I won’t bother blogging as having read Allie’s really rather excellent post over on Green House about HE she has said everything and far more, way better than I would have done. Might expand on the rest of it a bit later, but for now it’s been a big up and the end of a down week.

Better but in the immortal word of Catchphrase host Roy Walker ‘It’s good but it’s not right!’

Despite going to bed by 11pm last night I had one of those nights where your dreams are so vivid and exhausting that you are feeling more tired when you wake up than before you went to sleep. So I stayed in bed a while longer being interupted by requests to wipe bottoms and ‘look at this Mummy’ brought to my bedside (or at least the en suite!) until 9am when I was woken from yet another realistic dream by the doorbell!

I shot downstairs expecting it to be – and indeed rightly so – my Dad, so he made himself at home while I quickly got dressed and then plied him with coffee! 🙂 Aside from a brief rain shower right at the end of the day it has been bright and sunny and very windy here all day so perfect line drying weather that I made full use of with about 4 loads of washing :-). I also took advantage of Dad being here to leave the kids behind with him and head out to the library to return some books and sneakily walk round the town for 20 minutes child free too 🙂 Much needed and much appreciated this week!

I came home with some doughnuts for lunch for us all which we accompanied with some lovely crusty rolls from the bakers and the free packet of new improved Walkers crisps that came through the door. I remember free samples being posted really regularly when I was a child, don’t remember the last time we had any here. Dad stayed for lunch and then went off.

The children played with plasticine first thing and I showed Davies a few techniques for joining pieces together without them falling apart again. We covered keying the two surfaces with criss-cross patterns using a tool and making a hole in one piece and a protrusion in the other and then blending them. We briefly discussed other ways of joining things too.

Dad read Davies some of the My Naughty Little Sister book I had borrowed from the library. I remember either being read them aloud or reading them as a new reader myself as a child and had been telling Davies about them the other day as of course he is in full reciept of a naughty little sister of his own! I think it went down well, but I was making lunch so I can’t be sure. My Dad reads aloud really nicely, I used to love listening to him as a child. His voice totally alters and takes on this soft, lullaby like quality – he could have narrated children’s stories on TV and been excellent at it. I don’t know whether everyone’s voice changes to such a degree when they read aloud as it’s infrequent you hear other adults reading to children and I suppose you need to be a very fluent reader who is reading slightly ahead of what they are actually saying aloud in order to get the inflections right. My Mum, and Ady for example both read aloud in a slightly slilted manner which makes them not nearly so pleasant to listen to as my Dad. I did speculate to Davies that actually it could very well have been my Dad who read that book to me as a child but I don’t think he felt as sentimental about that as I did! 😉

Davies was desperate for me to do something ‘with him’ this afternoon so despite my natural inclination being to curl up with my laptop and leave them to it I did spent more time than I usually would sitting on the floor and ‘doing stuff’ with them both. I did have about an hour out to take a phonecall which left me spitting but as that was probably the only low point of my day and is hopefully in hand and getting resolved I’ll shove that to one side! I did ring the Badger leader lady having driven past the venue for Monday to check I knew where it was and found a big notice board outside listing all the regular meetings there with contact details for each. Turns out the Badgers here is a group of about 16 children ranging in age from 5 to 10 with, she says, a good mix of ages. The cost is £15 per term but she said to just come along and see what he thinks and if he likes it then we can pay to join after Easter. The uniform is £13 and then you give it back in and get the next size up (so I assume it is all second hand / used / rental type basis) which also sounds very sensible. She is quite happy for me to stay, for as long as he needs me and I have already got back up for staying home with Tarly from my Dad if Ady doesn’t get home in time – so feeling quite cheery about that next week. 🙂 Davies is slightly less thrilled but prepared to give it a go having ascertained that I will be there too – at least for now.

So phonecalls out of the way we did some drawings. Davies had started some Easter themed pictures of chicks and eggs so I drew the Easter Bunny and Scarlett coloured it in, Davies did some writing – he wrote ‘SBSHPR’ for ‘spacehopper’ which I thought pretty good and copied ‘EASTER BUNNY’ out too. Then I remembered we had a couple of Easter crafty type books kicking around from last year so we made some colour in and cut out Easter baskets and vases of flowers too. We watched Green Eggs and Ham, Sneetches, Zax and Grinch Night dvds while doing this so sang along happily. 🙂

Then with half an hour til teatime Davies wanted to do ‘one more easter egg type crafty thing pleeeeeease’. So I decided to take one more of the Real Home Educators Initiation Tests and did papier mache for the first time! 🙂 We had a newspaper in the recycling (part mached already thanks to being out there in the rain!) and mixed up some flour and water paste to cover a couple of balloons. They both did really well actually. They helped rip up newspaper into strips and remained surprisingly mess free. They both waned towards the end, which was a slight relief as their efforts needed a little tidying which they were happy for me to do and then they had sausage and mash for their tea. Well actually they ended up doing a Jack Sprat and his missus type swap with Tarly eating all the mash and Davies eating most of the sausages, but never mind!

Dinner tonight is a Friday night favourite of tacos and fajitas, which unfortnately falls to me to be cooking so I really must go and do so.

Don’t expect I’ll be around much tomorrow, I’m off to a NCT Nearly New Sale in the morning and tomorrow night Ady and I are going to see Little Britain Live. Hurrah, it’s the weekend! 🙂

the end is near
and so I think I know the reason
it has all become so clear
it’s like the changing of the seasons

as sure as night follows day
as sure as my eyes have welled up
with tears, I now know why
I need my mooncup

Tantrums, I’ve had a few
Irrational and rather tetchy
unable to explain quite why
my reasoning has been quite sketchy

But now I know, I know the truth
I know just why I am so fed up
It is because of my period
I need my mooncup

There have been times, I’m sure I blogged
I’ve carried the woes of the whole nation
but now, I realise
It was because I was due, for menstruation
I cried it out, I shouted loud
I NEED MY MOONCUP

To think, I had a crap week
and didn’t reach my full potential
It was not all my fault
I was pre-menstrual

For what is a woman? What has she got?
If not a regular cycle – then not a lot
to slam those doors, to stamp and shout
to primal scream, to let it out
I offer my excuse, I cannot lose
I’VE GOT MY MOONCUP!

The day started well – Ady had a load of powerpoint type stuff to do for work so we worked on it together while the children played, then he made us lunch to take with us while I got the children dressed to go out and he stayed behind to tidy up the house before going to work later. He’s a far better housewife than me and I’m a far better powerpointer – teamwork! 🙂

Me and the kids headed over to Julie’s in fairly good spirits, I put a Phil Collins cd on and sang along very loudly while introducing the children to the delights of Mr Collins and his drum kit and bashing the steering wheel as I went. We arrived and the children went off to jump on Jack and Maisie’s bed which is what the four of them seem to spend most of their time doing together round there while Julie and I talked Home Ed groups.

Then we went off to an Activeo event which is local-ish to Julie – gym games for all or something. The venue is a small private school which Activeo are leasing space in a couple of times a week, so a traditional school hall / gymnasiam. Jack and Maisie, Davies and Scarlett ran around together with the rest of the children there (about 15 in all I guess) but I felt a bit spare-part ish which is not like me and I do know everyone there but struggle to strike up conversations with them really and know I must come across as a bit aloof, which is not me at all really.

The session started and it became apparent straight away that Davies was not going to want to join in. I made the fatal error of threatening him with being taken home if he didn’t participate and that’s what he chose to do. 🙄 – at self and offspring! Julie then introduced me to the woman who is in charge of the leasing side of this venue who I know she has been bigging me up to and telling her we really must meet cos we are sooo alike, the woman was all gushing and trying to shake my hand and I was all stressed and trying to persuade Davies – in a non coersive, TCS sort of way to fit in with the vibe in the room – to get his arse back in the circle and join in with the throwing the ball and shouting out your name type ice breaker. So I was a bit vague and harried. 🙁

I joined in for a bit too and sat between Davies and Scarlett. Scarlett was quite happily sitting next to Maisie and enjoying it really, Davies was loathing every minute. Then they split up into a standing up circle and the lady paired the children up. Davies flatly refused to even look at the boy he’d been paired up with and was just tucking himself behind me, while Tarly had led Maisie up a load of steps and was standing at the top dangerously close to the edge. I went to rescue them and by the time I got back to the circle Davies had disappeared back off to the side again. At which point I gave up. I had not really, really wanted to be there in the first place, I don’t feel at home with the people, Davies was driving me mad and didn’t want to be there anyway, I could feel this woman waiting to spring herself on me the instant I was childfree (Julie’s told her I know *all about* fundraising and marketing and stuff) and the hour was going to cost me seven quid I don’t really have to force my kids to join in with something they have no desire to do.

So I left. I cried all the way home, ranted at Davies – who insisted he was shy. FFS he is the least shy child I know. Those of you who have asked him to stop running up and down corridors yelling his head off with a posse of other small boys at youth hostels will confirm this, those of you who have had him in your house, disappearing from my side the instant we arrive and only coming back grudgingly when it’s time to go home will also confirm this. If there is one thing me, Ady and both our children most certainly are not it is shy! 🙄

So he went to his bedroom, I made a load of phonecalls I’ve been putting off as I was feeling suitably aggressive and crap anyway. 😉

After half an hour I went to talk to him (he was calmly playing up there, not locked away sobbing btw) and discussed it a bit more rationally. I explained that there will be times when he does not know the people or the place very well but the way to deal with it is to try and get involved rather than hide behind me. Then I let Scarlett go and play with him again as they were both bereft at being seperated (she’d comforted him all the way home in the car) and I was called up there about 15 minutes later to have a meal in his cafe which he’d made to ‘cheer you up Mummy’. There was a sign, I had a proper invite, there was a menu and he’d set up a table and chairs. We had three courses, with drinks followed by chocolate mints. I think I might have suggested before that we watch too much Masterchef ;-). So all friends again. 🙂

By the time Ady got home I’d spoken to Julie on the phone about it, but I’ll save that for elsewhere and had lost patience with the whole world again so rather than end up being cruel to people who didn’t deserve it I retired to the bedroom with the laptop for some IT therapy (beats rescue remedy any day! 😉 ) and left Ady to sort out bathing them, clearing up and getting dinner on. I returned to dole out bedtime cuddles and collect a glass of wine!

Tomorrow, tomorrow will be better. And if it’t not then I can’t blog about it anyway cos Ali and Freya are coming and Ali reads this 😈

Davies: (watching Wallace and Gromit) Wallace is the Big Were Rabbit really. He likes carrots and cheeses.

Scarlett: I’ve got a book about cheeses!

Runs off and returns with a My first Christmas Story board book.

Scarlett: Look, there’s baby cheeses in the stable asleep!

It’s just been one of *those* days today really. Kids were hard work, my mother was hard work and my grandmother was hard work. I made a phonecall which was hard work and frankly when you’re working this hard you kind of expect to at least get a lunch break or a paycheque at the end of it. Or at least be able to go for a wee without company. Ah well! 🙁

My Granny was on top form today, she ‘tested’ Davies by asking him things like ‘whats 2 plus 2’ and asking him if he knew his ‘abc’ 🙄 then when I explained about how we don’t do that because abc is just alphabetical order and learning 2 plus 2 by rote is actually utterly pointless unless the child cares/understands/appreciates the revelance of two whats plus two whats is four whatevers it is once again, parrot fashion learning. OK I’m not belittling abc or 2+2 but why can’t people get into their thick heads that actually while that is not irrelevant as such there are far greater things to be filling children’s heads with. I really thought she’d grasped and understood what I was getting at with autonomy and formalised learning and so on last time we spoke but it would appear not. 🙁 She went on to ask what I was ‘teaching’ him at the moment and during what hours did we do sit down learning. I explained, possibly with slightly less patience and probably rather defensively that it doesn’t work like that either and actually got fairly arsey when she started driving further home with her point and asking what was ‘recommended’? By whom FFS!!!! ARGH!

Anyway (returns from cupboard under the stairs having chanted safe and warm, calm blue ocean, cool wet grass 27 times and returned breathing and pulse rate to within normal parameters once more) she then got caught up with my Mum in a big debate about John’s funeral, what his will had consisted of and all sorts of rehashed old ground. At which point I buggered off into the kitchen with the children and made snickerdoodles. Again. Which failed to rise. Again. All the while wondering why I was listening to my grandmother and mother having the same arguments they’d always had and I’d always listened to since childhood, only this time I was hiding out in my own kitchen. 🙄 Granny left and Mum stayed.

Davies was on a real loud and crazy roll today so I was trying to keep him in check by pulling out a constant round of things to try and keep him sitting down and occupied. We tried marble runs, we tried geomags, I suggested puzzles, drawing, all sorts and nothing worked. Scarlett did remember yesterdays 100EL letters but failed to get the hang of t today. We ended up doing some hama beads, Scarlett soon lost interest but D stuck it out and created an aeroplane of his own design, completed a chick from the pattern book and finished an egg that I had started.

So, in all it was probably an ok day really, and given the amount of emails flying about tonight and IM chats I am having while trying to compose this post, coupled with the several glasses of restorative wine I have consumed it is all looking so much better. So I’ll predict tomorrow will be a better day and be done with today for now!

Drop Dead Fred was one of the first films Ady and I watched together. I don’t recall how or where or why particularly but we called each other ‘snotface’ affectionately for years afterwards and infact occassionally still do. This morning while trying to find Spider for D & S to watch at their request Ady found this instead so stuck that on for them.

Which meant I got woken up by Davies leaping on the bed yelling ‘Snot Face WAKE UP!’ and bringing me a rather good picture of Fred that he’d drawn! They’ve been calling each other Snot Face all day 🙄

So as predicted last night me deciding to make myself available to them for the day sent them underground 😉 They spent a good hour playing in Tarly’s room, initially they were making some sort of camp / tent using her duvet and various blankets to shroud the room. I remember playing the same game in my bedroom as a child. I had a fairly large bedroom with two single beds in it and used to put a sheet across the gap between them to create a tunnel and then manage to tent out the rest of the room with blankets too, then Frazer and I would crawl around with torches and eat our lunch in there – great fun! 🙂 I resisted the temptation to join in and left them to it making phonecalls and sorting out small mammal groups to Davies to attend instead. They reappeared a while later both covered in highly scented, very pink make up! Davies looked erm, stunning 😯 and Scarlett just looked overdone – I should have captured them on camera really but instead I handed them a baby wipe each and told them to ‘get that muck off your face, you’re not leaving this house looking like that!’ or something! 😉

They played with the geomags and wanted to watch another film so I tried to find the Planet Earth dvd and put ET on by mistake so they watched that with much chattering going on. Then I did find the Planet Earth dvd and we watched most of it but not very intently as D was semi playing with geomags and S was asking so many questions that we ended up talking over it constantly so I gave up about half way through.

S was in a cuddly mood so I gathered her up and finally got out 100EL for her to look at. We did about four in a skipping to bits she liked sort of way and she very ably recognised a, m, s and e and was doing the say it slow, say it fast thing very well. 🙂 She was so thrilled with herself and would probably have sat there all afternoon doing it if I’d let her but I want it to go in slowly and surely rather than overload and have to start from scratch again next time because she’s forgotten it all. Loads more enthusiasm than D shows for reading even now though, which is so heartening. 🙂

As expected it got a response from D that I was doing it with S – he kept calling out the answers and joining in to show off, but if it keeps him competitive and therefore ahead of her then it can’t be a bad thing really can it. I think getting D to read has always been more about psychology than ‘teaching’ and S starting to learn is clearly the next phase in pushing him forward. She then dug out about ten books from her bedroom and we sat and read all those together (I read, not her 😉 ) with D standing over us and making some good attempts to read the odd word here and there as S attempted to pick out the odd letter.

We’d had lunch and I was in a craving something sweet type mood so I suggested doing some baking. I foolishly offered cookies or snickerdoodles and predictably they both insisted on different choices. So I said I’d cook one with one then one with the other, which given the size of our kitchen is a better way of baking with them anyway really but this led to rows about who would be first. Eventually I did the ‘whoever guesses which hand the penny is in gets to go first’ method of selection and Davies won. This sent Scarlett into floods of tears but she was eventually pacified by playing with her car boot toys. I found a pack of ready mix cookie stuff to just add water to lurking in the cupboard so we made them (and I thought they tasted like just add water cookies too but the kids liked them), then Tarly and I made some very poor snickerdoodles. The mixture showed more promise in texture than my previous two attempts but they melted so flat in the oven that they just merged into one thin sheet of them. Still tasted nice but I’m determined to perfect that somehow!

I then did find the Spider video so we stuck that on while they ate cookies and then only wanted strawberries for tea as they were so stuffed. Scarlett and I started to play with Education City but flushed with success from knowing a, m, e and s she was reluctant to get any guidance and so gave up. Davies wanted to play but I couldn’t get the free trial to load on the other laptop so I ended up letting him play Nick Jr and Scarlett went in to observe.

Ady had rung to say he would likely be late home as he’d been in a Managers Meeting and come out to piles of stuff on his desk so I started to lay and light a fire (which I used to be able to do adequately but have utterly lost the knack of through lack of practise) and got the kids in their pjs. In the end Ady came home in time to help with bedtime and rescued the fire too 😳 and is now cooking dinner. He has work related woe I think he needs some stroking over so I’ll be off to do that shortly.

It feels like quite a productive day really although there has been an element of shouting and a fair bit of feeling like it’s harder work than it needs to be. I think that is me and my state of mind rather than anything to do with the children though and as Ady and I have a night out on Saturday I imagine that will be taken care of by the weekend.

Tomorrow I will be entertaining the two generations above me aswell as the one below so expect me to be less than pulling my weight in the internet saving campaign. 🙂

It has been brought to my attention today that there are really people out there, existing among us who have a computer and a working email address but only check their inbox on a once a week basis. Yes that’s right people, ONCE A WEEK!

Now you or I can hardly comprehend such carelessness I know, why it would be as foolhardy as having a credit card and just spending on it willy-nilly without giving a thought to whether you were nearing your credit limit or in a position to pay it back wouldn’t it? It would be like having perfectly good, free education and childcare rolled into one available but choosing to educated your children at home instead. Like I say, crazy!

Anyway, these people all seem to the ones who run local youth type organisations such as Badgers, Beavers and other small mammals (thinking of calling the possible new HE group by a mammals name actually to be inkeeping – what do you think to SHREW – Some Home Residing Educators in Worthing) so emailing them for details about their groups is unlikely to get a speedy reply.

So this morning I got back on the websites for both and ring round a sucession of regional and local phone numbers for people called Marion and Keith and the like before finally getting to the right person for each.

Keith (not his really name 😉 ) from the Beavers tells me that yes there is a Beaver group on a Monday at the church literally round the corner from us, but at the moment it has no leader. Infact says Keith sounding really quite Eureka! about the whole idea ‘Do *you* know anything about scouting? Perhaps….’ I cut off what has probably been Keith’s biggest flash of inspiration of his life to date rather hastily ;-). So Beavers is out for now, they are fairly categoric about them being 6 anyway but at least his name is now on their waiting list and Keith assures me they will be in touch ‘in due course’.

Marion from Badgers was slightly less able to help with specific details like cost and uniform (although being a SJA lady I imagine if I’d needed guidance with the correct way to wind a bandage or deal with a minor scalding incident she would have been invaluable!) but she did confirm that Badgers locally to us runs on a Monday evening in a youth centre not too far from us and that the best thing to do is to go along next week with Davies and speak to the Badgerette or Badger Queen or whatever the leaderlady is called.

So that’s what we’ll do.

Talked to my mum about starting a new group yesterday, just as a real life, no personal interest type sounding board and managed to get quite excited about it again – clearly unfinished business there then!

This morning I have had a couple of scary letters so I bit the bullet and made a couple of phone calls and instead of not picking the phone up when it rang with withheld numbers I answered it both times it rang today on the basis I’d rather know about something about to happen and try and prepare myself for it. Anyway both calls were from HomeEducators, one asking about the Worthing Group (is that news travelling very fast or A Sign? 😉 ) and one trying to track down a HEer she used to know who lived on a houseboat and had a child called ‘Noname’ or something equally out there. Clearly not the sort of HEer *I’d* be in contact with ;-). I told the bloke after a local group roughly what he could expect if he came along to one I was considering setting up and he was really up for that, so my first attendee recruited!

So my vision for a group then, for Joyce, reading from her duvet 😉

Venue – needs to be accessible to public transport, have adequate and free parking, be ground floor, have some sort of kitchen and toilet facilities although a kettle and a bucket could suffice ;-), have tables and chairs, not be too immaculate ;-), an outside space would be utterly fab but not essential and it needs to cost no more than about £10 an hour. Worthing area ideally over to the west of the town as that is the direction the gap is in although not too far as that is moving away from me!

Group – running for two or three hours. As good a mix of ages and gender and educational philosophies as comes really. I guess I’d be striving to replicate what was good about WAG on a good session and that was:
A weekly theme which most attendees brought something related to – a craft activity, an idea for a game, some books or posters.

Fairly structured activities with very little of the running completely wild for two hours although I am not averse to a last half hour of that aslong as there is no wilful descruction going on with it.

The main aims for me are some socialising – the chance for the children to be in a room full of other Home Educated children for a couple of hours a week, the chance to engage with peers (which I consider to be any child under about 13 rather than within a year’s age range of them), the chance to participate in activities as a team and allow skills such as leadership, teamwork, cooperation and so to develop. And the chance for me to meet other local HE parents/carers. I enjoy the sitting and drinking tea while debating the ups and downs of our lifestyle choice for an hour a week rather a lot!

I do know that the possibility of grants and other fundraising is possible although that would be a bit of a back burner type priority.

I would like to use the benefit of being a group to get discounted entry to places and organise field trips / educational trips. I would also like to get in people occassionally to run music sessions, drama sessions, science workshops etc although it is possible that there might be parents or contacts within the group who can provide this.

It’s not so far away from where we started in the very beginning last time but I think there were too many of us involved in what the group would be about and too much politicising went on. Because I’d be doing it alone I would be less worried about ensuring every individuals needs were met and more inclined to say ‘this is what the group is, you either want to be part of that as it is or you don’t’….

Today I have revelled in my mother’s generosity and loved every minute of it :-).

But first, why I might well be crazy for trying… Since Christmas I think I must have been contacted by about 20 families via the EO website where I am listed as a local contact for our town. I probably average one or two a week and they vary from people already HEing, people thinking about it with pre school age children, people HEing moving to the area, people taking children out of school and people just curious about what happens if they did take their children out of school. I have a draft email response with all the local information and some handy online resources written which I amend accordingly and email back. Most continue the dialogue with at least one follow up email and sometimes I actually get to meet the person I’ve been emailing.

I think I have had the thought bouncing around in my subconscious for a while now but this morning I had a ‘thank you for all that information’ type email back asking if I knew anything about the WAG group she’d heard about. WAG was of course the group that Jenny and I set up last year and I closed towards the end of the year due to all sorts of reasons with a sense of relief and freedom. Now when I gave it up it was with the intention of getting more involved with Activeo (the big HE group over West Sussex / Hampshire way) and although my involvement had probably been more half hearted and feeble than it could have been I do go to anything listed in the newsletter which looks remotely interesting, I’ve been to everything Julie hosts and I gave the drama a go a few weeks back. I have arranged a local event at the soft play here in Worthing for later this month and thought I’d do a walk at some local gardens in April and then a trip to the Pick Your Own farm in May, so I’m aiming to do something once a month – free to attend wherever possible. But Activeo just bores me somehow, it is so established and entrenched in AGMs, QBMs, groups for new members, groups for making interim decisions inbetween QBMs and it has such a group of egos trying to clash themselves together running it and being treasurer and secretary and moderator of e group that there seems very little passion or enthusiasm left for actually doing anything particularly relevant to educating children. There are some excellent events for older children – there is a science group meeting once a month for example, but monthly doesn’t really cut it and the few things I’ve been to have been in crappy venues which are probably the only places who’ll have such a bunch of ‘out there’ HE folk back a second time, run by lacklustre, flat, wishy washy people (the drama teacher was really not at all exciting, passionate or inspirational) who are probably the only ones who’ll agree to do it when the bulk of the children are cheeky, disinterested or even downright rude. I think the original trailblazers are either long gone and forgotten or believed their own hype to such a degree that they disappeared up their own arses and have not yet reappeared. Anyway! 😉 Julie is desperate for me to get more involved and keeps suggesting my name to people for things like fundraising and so on and really that is not what I want to be spending my ‘spare’ time doing. I have said before that I do not have the energy or time for doing charitable works for the HE community – I either want to do something which reaps as much back for me and my children as I sow into it – or I want to be making cash from it! 😉

So this morning I sat there a-thinking and a-wondering and I came up with the realisation that the gap ‘in the market’ that existed which prompted Jenny and I to set up WAG in December 2004 is actually still there, infact it is probably a bigger gap than it was even back then. I learnt plenty from that experience and there were things we did that I wouldn’t repeat but I know that after a good week I was fired up with huge amounts of passion for what we were doing, the children were enjoying it and it just worked really. So I sort of have a plan 😉 I’m going to cast a few emails out to gague interest, I’m going to have a bit of a ring round to find a potential venue meeting all of *my* criteria and I’m going to see if I can’t set up a group which is exactly the group that me and my children would like to go to and then see if anyone else wants to be there too. I’l give it a very clear timespan to work or not work, I’ll be clear about what it will be about, how it will work and so on and I’ll just see if there really is a reason why there is no Home Ed group in a 30 mile stretch along the south coast other than the fact that the right one just hasn’t been set up yet.

So I rang Julie to chat it through with her this morning and as expected she was a little hesitant and keen to push me towards Activeo again and to be honest I was more after chatting it through with a third party than her actually buying into the idea of attending or getting involved herself but actually her lack of enthusiasm has had the opposite effect on me and I am now even more fired up about it. So we’ll see. As I said I could well be mad to even consider the idea but I am feeling the lack of a local group myself so the logical thing to do it to create one and see whether others are too. Right?

So, back to today and my Mother then. 🙂

Mum arrived with us around 10am and after playing geomags with Davies for a while we debated whether to go out or not which had been our original plan. Davies decided he wanted to go to The Dinosaur Place so Mum, who was financing the day suggested going there first, looking round the indoor bits and then going somewhere else for lunch as their coffee shop is quite poor. So we wrapped up warm (beautiful sunny day, three loads of washing dried on the line today, but still very very cold) and headed off. We walked round the Planet Earth bit and for probably the first time the children didn’t dash round like lunatics but actually asked about some of the pictures and posters and listened while I read some of the stuff to them. We talked about weather, volcanos, fossils, ice ages, neanderthal man, Ancient Egypt, dinosaurs, rainforests and space – all briefly it has to be admitted but I think we ticked history and geography fairly well. 🙂 Then we walked round the indoor catci garden and chatted about them quite a bit, to the point that we said we’d look at cacti for sale and might buy them one each. We had a very brief peep outside round the dinosaur area and then did ineed go in to the houseplants and get them a small cactus each. I do have photos of the children which I might flickr if any are any good but I only worked out how to turn the flash off half way round and tbh most of them are so similar to the pictures taken there before it’s hardly worth posting them again!

Then we drove through some of the nicest bits of the South Downs scenery back to Brighton, passing the place Joyce stayed at last summer, which Davies amazingly recognised. He suddenly piped up from the back of the car ‘we’ve been here before’ and although he couldn’t remember why or exactly when (he did when I reminded him) I was quite impressed 🙂 Then into Brighton Marina for lunch. We also popped into the discount bookstore where Davies got a sticker book with insects and Scarlett got an excellent colouring book with loads of empty squares and loads of mosaic stickers to fill them in with.

We came home and the children played with those, the geomags and the polly pocket thing from yesterday while constantly interupting me and Mum trying to talk 🙄 until Ady got home and I made him take them upstairs so I could finally finish a conversation with Mum I had been trying to manage all day! They both did some nice colouring and Davies made a stab (albeit very reluctantly) at some reading and did some lovely writing during the course of the day too.

So a very nice day really although the children both drove me slightly crazy by being very demanding all day and not shutting up with endless questions – I realised that since we have stopped being out and about so much and spending more time at home just the three of us lately they have gotten used to me not trying to talk to other people and are really annoying about knowing when it’s not OK to talk across a conversation and ask inane questions just for the sake of talking. 🙄 We are home tomorrow though and I plan to watch Planet Earth with them and actually sit and watch it with them and answer any questions and see where that leads us, maybe a trip to the library and as much constant questioning and attention from me as their hearts desire. Who wants to bet they don’t want to know me at all and spend all day playing together beautifully? 😉 Then the rest of the week we are out and about again (yes, Ali, Friday, come see my incredible don’t even pause for breath talking children 😉 ) or having friends round so it’s a pretty full week lined up. 🙂

I had this plan to go to bed all early and sober last night. I blame Ali for it not happening 😉 So I was not as enthusiastic about getting up with the children at 6.30 this morning as I perhaps could have been, so Davies actually said ‘I’ll look after Tarly Mummy’ and swept her off downstairs, plied her with something to eat (not sure what) and put a Winnie The Pooh film on for her. When Ady and I finally surfaced a good hour later he was so proud of himself and explained ‘I love my little sister very much. I like looking after her!’ Bless 🙂

It’s been Davies’ turn to be the child I adore most of this week actually. We had a few rocky times a few weeks back but we seem to have both gotten over whatever it was and he’s been lovely this week. Really grown up, really helpful and you can just see the glimmers of the man he might become – many shades of his Daddy in him so it’s no surprise how lovable I’m finding him just now. 🙂

So we went off to find a car boot sale this morning and the one we were expecting to be there wasn’t so we went further to the one I’ve visited with Julie a couple of times. Scarlett and I went round together and Ady and Davies went off bargain hunting together. They brought back a cuddly Shawn the sheep, a Wallace hand puppet and some cuddly character from Chicken Run. Oh yes Davies is a fully paid up member of the Aardman fanclub 😉 And all for under a pound you know! Tarly and I splashed out and spent a whole two quid which netted us an almost mint condition fun bus thing, a Polly Pocket light up thingy and this peg and block thing that I have trawled the internet trying to track down but can’t and given it’s retro packaging I would say could well be older than me! A true haul! 🙂 And they have been played with all day today so well worth the investment 😉

We dropped Ady off at my parents to go logging with Dad and came home so I could antibacterial wipe and spray all the car boot booty and make lunch ready for Dad and Ady to return. Dad stayed awhile and then when he left I went to do our week’s food shopping for next week.

When I got home Ady and Davies went outside for an hour or so. They cleaned out my car which was being used as some sort of holding bay for a load of work related stuff out of Ady’s car from when we went to Melrose, messed about with some bedding plants and generally got muddy! Me and Scarlett played with the block and peg things, did some jigsaws, she helped me unpack the shopping and then she put glittery gloopy pink make up on her and I to make us both look all ‘fritty’. 🙂

Davies and I had a bit of a session with coins earlier, he has a spiderman wallet with a load of loose change so we counted all the coins, seperated them into denominations and then talked about how a 2p piece was worth two of a penny and so on all the way up to a pound coin – imgaine that is worth 100 of those pennies! and so on. I don’t know if we’ll go much further with it yet, after all I only truly realised the value of money at 31 years old (;-)) but it was a good, well illustrated start.

So now, the children are asleep, we’ve had a bath, we’ve had a lovely roast dinner, I have turned the TV off in disgust at Sian and Russell winning Just the two of us and now I am being asounded and awe struck by the beauty of both the subject matter and the putting together of the Planet Earth show on BBC1. We’re recording it for the children, I hope Davies at least is as captivated by it as we are being….

Fun 🙂