See now this is what this Home Education lark is all about!

Have spent a lovely morning at Julie’s with two other Activeo families. Stuart and his son J, who I have met before at another event when J was with his Mummy instead, and Becky and her twin girls, A and R.

J and A&R are all 3 and a half – so a few months younger than Monster, and of course the twins J and M were there who are a couple of months older than Teeny so a really nice age range. And all seven children got on really well. This is something I really seem to notice when we mix with HE children, there is so much more tolerance, playing together nicely and inclusion of all the children. Certainly at their young age they seem oblivious to the others ages, genders and so on and just get on with the serious business of playing!

Which meant that us four grown ups could have a bit of a sit down chat too which was really nice. I have met Becky a couple of times and she is someone who I thought I would get on well with – and today reinforced that – a shame she lives 40 miles away :-(. Stuart was very nice too – a mellow, laid back, cares about his family more than his job type bloke who was very easy to talk to. We sat and talked about how we first heard about HE, why we are choosing to go down that path, I am the only one who has had two pregnancies (J is an only child and the others were two sets of twins) so we talked about age gaps, sibling relationships and so on, what approaches we are thinking about for educating the children, what we think the benefits are, how scary the whole school culture is and so on. Intelligent, but non competitive conversation – a joy to have been part of 🙂

We left there and I took the opportunity to continue my quest for a poncho for Teeny at the newly opened Bognor branch of Matalan – but no joy! Julie has also asked me to get one for Maisie so the little girl cousins can extend their joy of looking alike to their outfits too! On the way home both children fell asleep in the car for about half an hour. I would normally attempt to stop this at all costs, but it was actually really nice to drive along for 25 miles with no-one shouting Mummy or kicking up a fuss when I took Carnival of the Animals off and put Will Young on instead!

Back home we have been mostly making a sandy mess! Julie had rung in a panic this morning about having 7 children over when it was pouring with rain so I called into Woolies for a selection of pens, crayons, crafty kits etc and Monster spotted some Magic Sand (the stuff which you out into water but when you take it out again it’s dry). So we got some which has now been evenly distributed, with the water, around our home!

Ady has just returned home so will go and be a dutiful wife asking questions about his day while fixing him a G&T!

Gonna find myself a passion
Gonna get myself a cause
Gonna have an opinion on everything
From sushi to dinosaurs

Gonna get myself educated
Gonna strive to be more well-read
Gonna dissect and repeat verbatim
What the great philosophers said

Gonna pepper my conversation
With topical facts and quotes
Gonna study Latin and ancient Greece
And learn Shakespeare by rote

Gonna read all the papers and watch all the news
Gonna know all about big issues
Will speak knowledgably and with such eloquence
Listeners will be reaching for their tissues

But where to start, what to learn
There are so many possibilities
So many avenues to wander down
So many resources and facilities

Should I open my heart to Jesus
Listen to operas of note
Devote my time to indie bands
Campaign for goldfish to get the vote

Convert my cats to feminists
Allow my son to wear a dress
Never shave my legs again
Don’t wear a bra to support my breasts

Spend my days creating placards
And writing to my MP
Make my name synonymous with
Fighting for shellfish equality

Ponder the plight of pensioners
And what it means to be a teenager today
Worry about global warning
And whether United will win away

I will teach myself in the art
Of making conversation
I will amuse and entertain
With energy and animation

I will hold views on world issues
Animal rights and vivisection
Nature versus nurture
Vaccination, natural selection

Campaign for a voice for every
Sector of our society
However insignificant
Or small a minority

Argue at length as to whether
Blondes really do have more fun
Redheads are quick tempered
Or simply don’t cope so well with hot sun

Are girls quicker to develop
Social skills and graces
Are boys better at logic and puzzles
And learning to tie their laces

Should we eat anything not organically grown
Should we ban wheat from our diet
Should we eat eggs, cheese, meat or fish
Should we grill it, bake it, fry it

A glass of wine is good for you
A bottle could cause early death
Garlic is good in moderation
But plays havoc with your breath

Exercise is good for you
Although I don’t see the point
You may be nice and skinny
But there’s huge stress on your joints

And when at last I’m old and grey
My education all complete
I’ll worry about the smaller things
And maybe even get some sleep.

A lovely weekend…

Saturday night Mum and Dad babysat while we went for a really nice meal here with Lynda and Stuart. Monster was a bit clingy about us (well me really!) going out and insisted I gave him his milk before we left (which when he dribbled quite a lot of made me think it might just be a ploy to get me all messy so I could have to get changed and delay leaving:-) ). We had a really nice meal, good conversation, excellent service and lovely food – would definitely go there again.

Lynda and Stuart came back with us for a coffee – I asked Lynda if it felt strange sitting in our house surrounded by all the same furniture with the same giant clock and pictures on the wall as she was used to up north – she said it was very odd! My parents who always seem to forget that just because it’s Saturday night it doesn’t mean we will be getting any sort of lie in the next morning as usual took forever to leave – or maybe it is their revenge for the years when me and my brother woke them at freak hours of the night and early mornings!

Sunday morning I met my Mum in Sainsburys and we bought all the necessary stuff for a barbecue, then a truly lovely day was spent in our garden with Mum and Dad, Lynda and Stuart, us and the kids. Ady did a really nice barbecue as usual, I took care of all the trimmings (strips of carrots and celery with dips, posh crisps, potato salad, french bread etc) and much wine, beer and food was consumed by all. We finished the day for the kids by walking down to the beach (about ten minutes at normal speed – nearly half an hour at kiddy speed with the two of them running between the six adults not sure who to bother next!). We took the train round the boating lake, ate ice-creams, walked down to the sea (where Mum and Monster both got very wet!) and then wandered home again. The kids had a big bath and Lynda out Teeny to bed while Ady sat with Monster. Both Ady and I agreed that it had felt a bit odd a couple of times knowing whether to stop the kids being all over Lynda. Obviously we used to let her get on with it as she was being paid to look after them, now we feel that we wouldn’t want to take advantage of the fact the kids are used to demanding her time, but she loved it – and let’s face it she wouldn’t have come to visit if she just saw them as ‘her job’.

When the children had finally gone to sleep Ady and I made sandwiches and stuff for tea while listening to Mum and Dad and Lynda and Stuart chat about the ‘youth of today’ – by which they meant us – Lynda and Stuart have two sons roughly the same age as me and my brother – it felt very strange to be the ‘youth of today’ I sort of see them as either my own children or perhaps the spotty teenagers hanging round park benches drinking Thunderbirds or Diamond White! They were all enjoying tales of how they had struggled while we all had it too easy nowadays, how none of them had credit cards or loans or whatnot and I swear the phrase ‘in our day’ has never been so well used! Once again it took till gone midnight, both Ady and I buggering off to have a bath and me finally reappearing in my dressing gown while Ady yawned and said ‘well I’m off to bed then’ before my parents finally went home! We did book our trip to London and ride on the London Eye while they were still here so that is all organised too now.

My Mum cornered me in the kitchen while I was tidying up after the barbecue to have a chat about ‘Our Relationship’. Very squirmy conversation really, she has obviously been leading up to it for a while and I can’t really answer much of it. She wants a closer ‘friendship’ with me, wants to be more involved in my life, wants to play a role in HE with the kids and basically the gist of it is she wants to be my friend. She has chucked this sort of stuff at me before and I’ve always avoided it. She is my mother, her and I do not have a great deal in common anyway and being ‘her friend’ seems to involve listening to her, at length talk about how crap it is being married to my Dad, how she wishes my brother will leave home, how lucky I am to have such as wonderful husband as Ady and how dreadful her parents were. I feel sorry for her but I don’t have space in my head or my life for listening to how crap someone else’s is – particularly when I don’t think there is much the matter with her life aside from her own inability to be content with it and count the blessings she does have as opposed to coverting what she believes to be the wonderful things everyone else but her is in possession of. I feel there have been a couple of very key situations within my life when I really needed my Mum to just be a mum and put her own feelings aside and not see everything in relation to her – and on all these occassions she failed. As such I love her lots because she is my mum and I can see she is doing her best to be a good grandmother but I cannot force the kind of closeness she wants from me because after 30 years it simply isn’t there. Never will she be the person I ring just for a chat, or to have a moan about Ady, or to ask advice about something – we just don’t have that sort of relationship and it’s not gonna happen now. But I have agreed that if she lets me know her day off each week we can spend it together (with the kids) and we’ll see how we go from there.

So I bought my Sunday Times yesterday, which attracted much interest from my Dad, who I shared my thoughts on letting my brain go with and he was very much in agreement that he feels I should strive to continue learning and growing instead of resigning myself to Wife Swap and Chick Lit! Having only read the first few pages (I spent about half an hour explaining what I am endeavouring to do, then my parents sat around ignoring the kids everytime they asked for something so my chances of reading the paper in peace were scuppered!) we did embark on some stimulating and interesting conversations about topical issues:
Whether we agreed with the initiative from several companies to offer bonuses and other rewards to employees who had full attendance;
Our feelings on record keeping on children and what would be acceptable in terms of ensuring children’s safety;
Our thoughts on this article.

Today we are off to an Activeo meeting at Julie’s house, which may well be a soggy occassion as the weather is grey and wet and horrid, later Julie and I are supposed to be going up to Ikea in Croydon but will be rained off if the weather is too yucky. I think that’s all for now 🙂

Sunny Saturday spent in Southsea…

So far its been a lovely day today, the sun has shone, the kids have been on their utter best behaviour and probably what’s put a big spring in my step – for probably the first time ever when I came downstairs from getting dressed this morning, Ady glanced at me and said ‘that’s a nice dress, it really compliments your figure’. Which was lovely on many levels; he had noticed! (he is good with letting me know he loves me but not so good at making me feel glamourous and gorgeous!); he said I looked nice instead of frowning at me, asking ‘new outfit, how much did that cost then?’; it clearly hid my rolls of fat well and made me appear sleeker, slimmer and better – which is enough to make any girl feel good (can’t explain why girl was the better word instead of woman, probably cos such concerns about appearance are flippant, immature and girly!) and given we had the crappy night from hell with Teeny being awake for hours, were trying to get the four of us out the house in order to be somewhere at a given time and were as always running late which normally results in crossness and door slamming it was a big boost to the ego! So off we set, already some 20 minutes late only to hit major traffic in at least three places which made us nearly an hour late altogether.

But it was fine. We were meeting Lynda – for those who have not been reading for long Lynda is the lovely lady who looked after the children while I worked a couple of days a week when we lived up north. She started with us when Teeny was only about 6 weeks old and Monster was just over 2yo. He had been at a nursery which he HATED and I got Lynda through an agency in desperation that maybe someone coming to our house to look after him instead of packing him off somewhere would work better – and it did! She was with us for nearly 18 months up north and we have stayed in touch and probably always will now – she went far above and beyond what we originally expected of a ‘nanny’ and what she was paid for and is sort of family now! Her and her husband are familiar with Southsea from holidays over the years so they are staying there and meeting us most days for a week.

So today we met up with them and had a ride round Portsmouth on an open topped tour bus, stopping for a sandwich at the docks where the HMS Victory and Invinsible are docked, which was veryt deja-vous – y as I went there loads of times as a child on school trips but have not returned for about 18 years! Really nice day, the kids were so happy to see Lynda they spent most of the day one on either side of her holding hands, Ady and Stuart had only met once before but they got on really well which sort of left me to walk around unencumbered and with my thoughts, which was nice actually! My head can be quite a pleasant place to be sometimes!

Home later than planned and Monster was promised a McDonalds if he could keep Teeny asleep all the way home (a big challenge as she only had about 7 hours sleep last night and had not napped this morning either) which he did masterfully well by tickling her, making her laugh, singing Peter Pan songs to her and getting her to dance! Having achieved his aim they both had McDonalds for tea, Teeny is now asleep having used her potty for 3 poos – so pleased with her on this – she has had no pressure from us but as soon as we get in the house she strips off, nappy included and uses the potty very well – she has only poohed on it so far – and as she calls this wee-wee I see cause for confusion later, but I would rather be mopping puddles than piles so thats fine!

Monster is in the garden doing stuff to prepare for the barbecue tomorrow – like lawn mowing, hedge trimming, blue recycling box tidying (putting all the alcohol tins and bottles to the bottom!!) and general crap clearing! I am about to see if I can pull off a second flattering outfit in one day for something to wear tonight and in an hour my parents will be here to babysit while me and Ady enjoy a nice evening with good food and alcohol with Lynda and Stuart.

A ps to add the bit I forgot at the end of the last post was that I am going to start watching at least one news show a day, read at least one sunday paper for a round up if not one a day – might buy loads on Monday and decide which I prefer! and inspired by all the reading blogs (none of which I have read but I am aware of their existance!) I am going to trade in my trashy chicklit brightly coloured novels for some serious reading soon too.

we’ll try that again then shall we…

Very. very cross with blogger about this one, it was a post i had been sort of composing all night and now a lot of it has gone as once i had typed it i ‘let it go!’ think Joyce’s cunning plan of doing it in word then copying it (although I know that was for spell check!) is a good one, then I can spell check and save it too.

So what I can recall of it was as follows:

Over on Merry’s blog last night there was an in depth conversation about stuff like feminism, gender roles, positive discrimination, sexism and so on (apologies in advance if that misses out any vital part or does not sum it up adequately). I don’t really have anything to add which wasn’t covered in the 50 odd comments, although I might have taken part more if Teeny hadn’t woken from 11.30 – 1.30 just as it was all happening. And don’t want to nick the conversation anyway (swiper no swiping!) but what it did get me thinking was that ten years ago I was passionate about stuff – I guess most teenagers have their activist, rent-a-cause, I’m a rebel with something to say me, type moments but I was really quite opinionated, would actively seek out a contentious discussion and was considered pretty articulate and intelligent at constructing a cohesive argument or getting a point across. My life kind of forked a different way then as I didn’t go to uni and sort of became a grown up with a mortgage instead 😉

I do feel though that in the four years since I stopped working full time I have slipped a bit into apathy about stuff really. I can’t think of anything I would get hugely passionate, write to my MP, take to the streets with placards, lobby the broadsheets about anymore. I still hold very firm and definite views on certain subjects – religion, parenting, violence 🙂 particularly domestic violence, abortion, voting, war etc but suspect we all do. I feel a bit ignorant on many issues in the news – I tend to skip past news on TV, don’t recall the last time I read a paper, kids won’t let me listen to any sort of radio show on current affairs and whether its laziness, contentedness with my own lot (I’m alright Jack), sheer can’t be arsed ness or if I am just too busy with the business of actually living my life to get caught up in such things I do feel it is probably doing me no good.
If I were to go to a dinner party (unlikely either that I’d be invited or would attend even if I was!) I would struggle with the conversation about the situation in the far east, slagging off Bush, my thoughts on the latest bill in parliament, even the latest music (Dido and Will Young i could handle, anything more cutting edge would be a toughie!). This has sort of snuck up on me and while I’m not about to trawl the net to find something to go and petition someone about I do think its a wake up call to be a bit more aware of the world I am bringing my children up in, challenge my mind (instead of just my body!) a bit and perhaps be a bit more savvy about issues greater than who is on the cover of Heat magazine, what the people on Wife Swap were like, whether Michelle and Stu have a future outside the BB house and so on. I think I may have dumber myself down to such a degree I have done myself a disservice and it is time to put that right again.

I think that was the gist of it, anyway!

Pooh day so not going to dwell on it too much…

Everyone was tired after a long and busy week, I had a headache, took the kids to Boots for a few bits where Monster was doing that little kid thing of touching everything – and I mean everything, trailing his hands along the shelves, smearing make up testers on his fingers, picking up all sorts of stuff and generally being annoying. What’s worse is I can clearly recall doing the exact same thing as a child, and my Mum probably did the same as I did and kept asking me not to do it, till eventually losing her temper and grabbing me a bit roughly by the arm and shouting (drawing attention from strangers!) then feeling guilty when I cried and acting like the best mummy in the world to try and make up for it, actively encouraging crappy behaviour again! Ho Hum!

Day started badly really with me giving Ady stick about getting the plastic train track out for Monster. I hate the plastic train track – Monster can’t really set it up on his own so I have to spend hours doing it only for him to recreate Thomas the (poxy bloody) Tank engine and have crashes all the time ruining the track which he then whines until I set up again. Teeny does her usual swiper act and keeps running off with the all the (really useful) engines, and even worse he utterly insists on having the Thomas DVD on while he plays with it. Then as Ady was going and he was saying see you later i started correcting him on pronoucing later (Monster has been dropping his Ts lately and its something which really bugs me so I am picking him up on it a bit, only to have his Daddy doing it) so general GRRRR! Fought the kids to get them dressed to go out to Boots, where they were horrid, then home where Teeny insisted on sitting on my lap eating my lunch even though it was EXACTLY then same as her lunch sitting ignored on her plate. Eventually took a couple of painkillers for my headache checked my watch and couldn’t believe it was only 1.30! The day was saved by my parents arriving seperately and diluting the kids a bit (although my mum made several hints about the fact I obviously couldn’t cope including saying to me when Ady got home ‘oh you’ll be okay now. well til Monday anyway’ and Dad giving me ‘looks’ when the kids got quite boisterous just before bathtime) The other comment from mum was ‘I know its hard, I used to do it!’ Ha! by the time I was Monster’s age I had been in pre school for nearly 2 years and I distinctly recall spending a lot of time with my grandmother too! Anyway there was me not going to dwell on it. I know we shouldn’t have stayed home!!

So the great font debate (sorry religious folks that’s font as in comic sans not the plays a bit role in christening ceremonies variety!) in the absence of anything fun to do with you know what how about a poll about the favourite font for my blog: the choices are as follows
this one!
arial
courier
georgia
lucida grande
times
trebuchet
verdana
webdings

Looking forward to a nice weekend, glad to see the back of today! will be more cheery tomorrow!

Hmm, never been stuck for a title before…

Uneventful but in a good way kind of day really. Up – well pretty much all night, but early, lots of playing went on with the small people while I spent a bit of time on the computer – starting to get out toys for them instead of leaving them totally to their own devises. They decide what they are going to do with said toys but I feel better for knowing all toys are getting played with and they seem to enjoy the variety. So today was the turn of the teaset and the sticklebricks which kept them amused for a good hour or so.

Then into the car to drive over to Julie’s – its a good half hour drive and I really thought Teeny would make the most of the chance for a sleep, but I found a carnival of the animals cd the other day so put that on in the car and we hmmed along and talked about the music all the way there which she joined in with too. The weather was dreadful for the journey but cleared up sufficiently for the four kids to go in the garden and make the most of the mud – brought home two very very mucky children! Julie had also made some playdough which went down well.

Decided not to go into Littlehampton, Teeny was on the verge of falling asleep, they were both truly dirty and wet and was in a mature and responsible mood about not spending money – for once – it won’t last! So came home where they carried on playing quite nicely and Teeny was in bed nice and early, Monster hung it out and I finally escaped at 9pm from his bedroom!

Having a well earned ‘day off’ tomorrow from meeting friends, packing picnics and generally going out. Nothing actually planned, will see what the weather, quality of nights sleep and mood of the three of us dictates. Have not done much work on ideas for an under 4s HE group either really so will do that tomorrow too. Also want to draft some stuff for the new website for me and Ady and have had a response from the local NCT who are interested in a column in my mag which kicked me into action a bit so have some stuff to do on that too – kids permitting! Bit of a mad weekend planned too – Lynda (our nanny from up north) is visiting with her husband and we are meeting them in Portsmouth for an open topped tour bus and lunch, then my parents are babysitting in the evening while me and Ady go out for dinner with them, and on Sunday we have planned a barbecue for them at our house with my parents too – another manic week again next week – so far Thursday is the only day without arrangements 🙂

and the rain came down in torrents!

what a dreadful night! It rained, it blew, it thundered and lighteninged, at one point all the upstairs windows blew shut, and throughout all this drama Teeny was awake and wriggling! Went to bed at about 11, read for an hour, so went to sleep at about midnight – at 1am she awoke and came into our bed, at 3am Ady took here away before I did something very horrid to her! At 3.30am he was back in our bed and she was asleep in her cot, at 5am she was awake and back in our bed at 7am she was awake for the day – arghhhhh!

Hate the new hoover too! its just so powerful it makes it really heavy to push (the suction sticks it to the carpet making it a two handed job to push it backwards and forwards and believe me I’m no 8 stone weakling! (I wish!)) on the plus side Ady loves it so I guess thats me excused from hoovering duties!

Have been asked if I would be interested in taking over the toddler / pre school section of local HE group – quite excited about the many possible activities we could do – making a list which I may share later!

Off out to dodge raindrops!

so that’s it then…

google ads – gone!
fun trying (although even I knew it was futile really) to influence said google ads – gone!
not sure why some of the blogs still have them though… is it midway through a changeover? have the ones to get the blogger bar been randomly selected? have i been spookily chosen in someway? is the simply the next in a series of things sent to piss me right off (car, dyson etc etc etc)? is it the result of a petition by the rest of you sent to blogger pleading with them to find some way of stopping me going on about google ads? is it a mysterious power beyond our knowledge stepping in to prevent Shakin Stevens from getting the recognition he deserves?

whatever it is I am going to focus on moving on from this dark period in my life. If anyone else is suffering please contact me, perhaps we can set up some sort of online support group, maybe we could work on a sort of twelve step recovery program from our google ad dependancy together – I am thinking of getting T shirts and other merchandise made up with slogans such as ‘a week with no google ads but coping’, ‘they can take my google ads but they can’t take my Shaky’ ‘blogger bar? I’d rather visit the hanging gardens of babylon’ and so on.

So time for a new hobby, need to evaluate what I am good at and find something to channel the energy in a new direction, so who knows the kids might even get some energy focused on educatin’ ’em!

Tomorrow we are off to Julie’s and will probably stop in Littlehampton on the way home – good charity shops for book raids there – and a couple of shops which may sell children’s ponchos which I now have a deep yearning to purchase for Teeny! That is all my silliness worn out for today, tune in tomorrow when I promise not to mention google ads!

FYI – from the blogger site – is there any point in going on???

What is the Navbar?
The Blogger Navbar replaces the default ad block formerly inserted on blogspot.com pages with a more useful navigation tool. Navbar features include:
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Search: searches the blog you’re viewing, via Google SiteSearch.
BlogThis!: a popup for quick ‘n easy blogging, further explained in the BlogThis! Help article.
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NextBlog: takes you to a random, recently-updated Blogger blog.
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Right then Home Education!

Today we have ticked off the following in our quest for a rounded, enjoyable and adequate education:
Socialisation – we spent the afternoon at Rachel’s house where the children were ‘exposed’ to three other children. Two the same age as Monster, one a boy, one a girl and a small baby. Aside from minor scuffles all children played well together and apart in splinter groups! The toys on offer were stimulating and educational and resulted in imaginative play, teamwork type skills and pretend games such as making and serving tea and supper to the grown ups using a selection of pretend food and a teaset; the boys played for a while with a set of toy cars, a garage and a car mat; Teeny played for ages on a toy till; Monster played for ages and ages and ages with a Mr Potato Head which he arranged in various ways using all the anatomical parts supplied and created various faces to demonstrate different emotions and feelings; there were some confrontations requiring the children to make use of and demonstrate their skills in negotiation, sharing, taking turns, telling tales 🙂 cause and effect (take a toy off E and he may well hit you) and so on.
Physical education – we walked around the local town this morning and walked to Rachel’s house this afternoon, allowing the children to get their daily exercise and use up excess energy.
Geography & Meteorology – we spent time observing the weather outside, including the colour of the clouds and the direction the wind was blowing them in, in relation to the direction we would be going to and decided to drive instead of walking. We also determined what apparal and footwear to don appropriate to the climatical conditions.
Maths – There was discussion about how many shops we would be visiting, how many bread rolls we would buy, Monster paid for some good in Woolworths and recieved the change
Daily planning – we talked about the structure and calendar for the day including meals and excursions.
Behaviour modification and management – the children were assured that further demonstration of bad behaviour whilst in the post office queue would result in no sweets in Woolworths. Self control was applied by all parties 🙂
Music – we sang along to Dora’s theme tune and sang the Peter and the Wolf song as we walked to Rachel’s.
Nutrition – Food and drink was served at regular intervals with discussion about what was wanted and what would actually be provided.
Biology – when Teeny hurt herself she was able to explain via pointing and a small amount of speech where she had hurt herself and who had done it.
Spanish – while eating their nutritious evening meal they watched Dora the Explorer!

No finds in the charity shops at all 🙁 Bought some sandwich boxes in Woolies as we seem to average about four picnics a week at the moment and I am getting through lots of plastic sandwich bags which pricks both my environmentally friendly conscience and my purse! Also thought the kids might like the idea of having their own little box of stuff to eat instead of raiding the cool bag at random and discarding sandwiches in favour of cakes!

Nice time – although very noisy – at Rachel’s. Baby K was teething or colicky or just generally being a baby and cried a lot, EL, E, Monster and Teeny did a fair but of general noisyness, Teeny was E’s chosen target for the day so she got a couple of crying moments and at the end Rachel gave Monster the option of staying with her until we meet again next week or helping to put the toys away and get his shoes on, which caused many tears and regressing to ‘I want to be with my Mama!’ After what we thought was a general mooting of the idea of upping to Norfolk from Kerry last week in the last seven days they have been up to Norfolk at the weekend, accepted an offer on their house, had their offer accepted on a house up there and are hoping to be in and settled for Christmas! Kerry asked me about HE today – I knew she knew something as although we have talked about E and EL starting school in September she has never mentioned Monster so although she can’t quite recall doing it we assumed Rachel had mentioned it and Kerry chose not to discuss it – which is fine. We were talking about money and stuff and she said ‘well Teeny could start pre school in a year’s time which would free you up’ so I said ‘she could, but she won’t, they’re not actually going to school’, apparantly when Rachel had told her I was going to HE she had thought it was just for the pre school bit. So we had as long and in depth a chat as is possible with five children about and I really do feel so good telling people now, I never seem to really get challenged too much about it and although I am sure they didn’t go away thinking about it as an option for them she certainly didn’t leave feeling we were mad, weird or about to damage our children either!
Monster is doing his usual post -E visit thing of playing very violently which I hate but he probably needs to do and express, Teeny is very tired and about to collapse somewhere so I’m off to start the bedtime winddown…

Ooh and comments on whether my new serious blog style is better and more appropriate or whether you prefer my usual looniness gratefully recieved! (But also probably ignored, after all its my blog and you’ll get what you’re given and like it!)

picture the scene…

Nic’s blog, a tumbleweed blows gently across the dotty background, the incidental music kicks in, a guitar being plucked in a melancholy,bluesy, have no purpose to my day type tune, Nic’ wanders into shot kicking a tin can mindlessly which cannons off of the blogger toolbar type thing that’s replaced my google ads.

Ghostly images flutter across, almost not there, of Shakin Stevens, The Hanging Gardens of Babylon, Hadrian’s Wall, Dinosaurs and Chicken Pox cures. Just like the last scene of BB there are distant echoes of voices, this old house begins to play faintly somewhere in the background…

Can’t believe my google ads have gone, feel quite bereft without them, like Tom without Jerry, like Dick Dastardly without the pigeon, like Michelle without Stu! Oh I know I’ve got two children, a fab husband, friends, a nice house, people who love me and all that but they really kept me going when things got tough – sob – I can’t talk about them anymore, I just can’t…

Right then, on with the day. About to get everyone dressed so we can walk into Lancing and post a parcel – a book I sold second hand on Amazon, which when I take out the posting cost and what Amazon have taken for their fees I made all of about a pound! Don’t think I’ll bother with that again as any sort of fool proof method to making my first million! Think maybe I’ll buy something in Lancing to give myself a hobby – nice book of crosswords or wordsearches or something – unless the thrill of trying to influence google ads can only be matched by extreme sports such as bungee jumping, white water rafting or pie eating competitions. Currently Monster is sitting on the floor colouring in and doing some worksheets on dinosaurs which he specifically asked for, Teeny is standing ontop of a wooden activity cube thingy (with beads, puzzles and stuff on it) which enables her to reach the top of the cupboards from which she is grabbing books and other objects to hurl at her brothers head – which he thinks is funny but will likely end in tears! She’s developed a real interest in puzzles these last couple of days, which is a relief as its taken her away from her games with the little people which always involve her jamming two against each other and making kissing noises – I would love to think she is just being loving but worry it is not something I’ve seen lots of on cbeebies and she might just be secretly watching adult channels while I’m out the room – this is Teeny I’m talking about, the child so precocious I wouldn’t be surprised if she can read, write and sneaks out of an evening when we think she’s sleeping to carry out her second job of public speaking at formal dinners on the subject of being a toddler in the new millenium!

On the subject of too much time on my hands 🙂 I developed this theory last night that there are only about 10 basic people types. This comes about because every time I meet someone new I am always reminded of someone else I know by them and when describing them to Ady I am always saying ‘oh she’s a bit like X, looks a bit like Y and has Z’s sense of humour’ Unsure as to what category I fall into, and what specific aspects of my character / appearance would be the deciding ones but an interesting theory to think about just the same.

Right off to get dressed and I think given the grey clouds, drive into Lancing. Have not been for a couple of weeks so a charity shop scour could be in order – list lovers, you may be getting one a bit later 🙂

Today I washed a Pteradactyl!

and I believe it to be a good example of the unfit state of my mind that I looked at the plastic toy for ages, utterly convinced that it had been much bigger before going in with the whites on a boil wash and had somehow shrunk…until I went to the car and found said larger plastic animal – which is identical except for being double the size – I had not realised we had two pteradactyls!

What else have I been up to today then? This morning I got out the cdroms I bought yesterday in Asda for Monster – DK Play and Learn – one for 3-5 yo about letters and numbers (reading and counting) and one for 5-7 yo about writing and calculating. As predicted the 2nd one is slightly beyond him still but probably not for long – and I think even Teeny could have a bash at the 3-5yo one in places with help. I have not been able to get the speakers to work on the pc so I let him use the laptop while I sorted them out by which time he had lost interest – but the plan is for him to spend some time on the PC doing stuff like that every so often.

Ady was in and out this morning – he left to do the local store visit, then came back while I typed a quote up for him, then out again to deliver it, then back in time for lunch and home for the rest of the day as he has a big presentation tomorrow which he wanted to ‘revise’ for. The kids spent some time setting up and squabbling over a Buzz and Zurg racetrack set – sort of Toy Story scalectrix thingy but both ate loads – they seemed to be eating cereal all morning, then lots of lunch too.

Then off to the local big park to meet a new HE contact – Elaine and her son J who is 4 1/2. Monster and J seemed to get on pretty well, they sort of sized each other up then ran off to chase each other about for an hour and a half! Teeny, bless her who is yet to realise she is a) lots younger than Monster and his mates and b) a girl was very inappropriately dressed (by me!) in a long and pretty pink dress with a very full skirt, which really hampered her already wobbly clambering about on rocks after two much bigger boys skills – I tried to tie a knot in the skirt to hitch it up a bit, but this offended her so was swiftly removed! We then adjourned to the playground bit where Monster highly impressed me, and was worthy of comment from E with his rope ladder climbing skills – he jumped, clambered and shouted with the best of them, while Teeny was ‘adopted’ by a group of little girls who all wanted to pick her up and cuddle her – which surprisingly she didn’t object to too strongly! It struck me suddenly that from having two children who I thought would never leave my side I suddenly seemed to be in possession of two remarkably ‘normal’ running round screaming and being a typical boy and girl type kids. All those reasons which in the beginning led me to find HE seem to have evaporated yet, I have never been more convinced that it is the right path for us. Maybe the kids have thrived on being back home, spending time with family (my parents, Chris and Julie and the twins), seeing other children two or three times a week and so on, maybe its an age thing – they are just getting more independant, or maybe (as I would secretly like to think!) now that pressure if off we can all relax into our new way of life without the worry of ‘how will Monster ever cope at school’. Whatever as usual I was very proud of them both, they are fab children and the highs far outway the lows.

A quick circle of the park on the train – Monster quite happily sat in the carriage next to J, opposite E while me and Teeny shared the one behind, then ice cream for the kids and tea for the grown ups before we all headed home. Really enjoyed meeting them, so nice for Monster to have another boy, a similar age who is also HE’d – we talked about it on the way home and he is really getting to understand what it all means a bit more now – even more so I suspect when E and EL start school next month. Teeny obviously has the twins who are the same age as her and HE’d and of course we will finally meet some of my ‘virtual friends’ who have same age offspring in London soon 🙂 Have already exchanged emails with E arranging to meet again next week. Have also replied to an email sent out about the local group we went to a couple of times earlier in the year offering to help out with some pre school age stuff and so on, so that could be good for later in the year.

It’s Raining

Have just realised why the cat was hiding under the sofa – heavy rain and if I’m not mistaken the odd bit of thunder and lightening is occuring here in Sussex right now – love it! Especially now we’ve got those packamacs!

Lipstick, Powder and Paint, is you is or is you ain’t?

The other big news of the day is that I have bought another domain name with a view to another website for me and Ady to start a consultancy business. Lots of work still to do on honing that one a bit more, but I feel a positive first step has been taken, particularly as it involved typing in my credit card number! Also bought a carry thingy from the php site for Teeny – its called a comficarry and is basically a strap on sling type thing – we are having odd days out here and there over the next couple of months and it would be great to not have to take the pushchair everywhere – especially if we go to London for a few days – this would enable me to manage both kids a bit better I think – and let her sleep too. I’ve got one of those hippychick hip seats which is good too, but has never had maximum use cos I fell pregnant with Teeny soon after buying it which scuppered using it for Monster and as two on the loose is a bit of a bad idea on my own I tend to use the pushchair all the time for Teeny – she is so giddy I think I need to start weaning her onto a bit of sense when out and about and this looked like as good a way as any….wow huge lightening and thunder then – was about to go to bed but have now drawn the curtains to watch for a bit.

Think thats all my general musings and a catch up of the day – tomorrow we are at Rachels in the afternoon, have not decided about the morning yet – maybe the cookie making set we bought in Asda yesterday and then we can take our masterpieces round for general consumption instead of them kicking around our kitchen for a couple of days!

there’s an old piano and they play it loud behind the green door, when i said ‘Joe sent me’ someone laughed out loud behind the green door, wish they’d let me in so I can find out what’s behind the green door…

ever wander what happened to those childhood heros and idols – or worse still they are either kicking around kidding themselves they ‘still have it’ like some mad old uncle dancing to Hi ho silver lining at a wedding reception, or you see them all washed up and fat and aged in a ‘where are they now’ feature in a magazine. I loved, and I mean loved Tony Slattery during my teens, till he went a bit loopy and disappeared for ages, he was on Celeb Who Wants to be a millionaire earlier in the year and I was quite excited about it but I guess I’ve just moved on cos he didn’t do it for me anymore! (but if anyone knows him, don’t tell him that, I don’t think he would be devastated about losing me necessarily but he still seemed a bit fragile and I wouldn’t want to feel responsible for him buggering off for another ten years!). Anyway moving on from those HANGING GARDENS OF BABYLON my new quest is to get Shaky up there in the google ads.

Out and about early this morning and loaded the kids in the car to take a trip to Matalan – I have seen the most cute little poncho thingy for Teeny in a magazine from Matalan for £7 which she just has to have, but they must be winter stock cos they weren’t there 🙁 but did stock up on vests, pants, socks etc new for the winter, also got Teeny a pack a mac thingy for stashing in the car and a couple of bits for the winter, then off to Asda for the food shop where I also picked up a pack a mac for Monster and a few bits of next size up winter stuff for him too – feeling most virtuous, have spent money but it is all required stuff from bargain outlets and nothing for me (more cos I didn’t see anything I liked than because its sunk in that I can’t afford anything and don’t need it anyway, but I didn’t spend so can feel good).

The kids sat side by side in the trolley, Teeny was bribed with a dummy all the way round (which goes against all sorts of deep instincts but I don’t normally take em food shopping so a bribe was due!) we also spent a bit more as a result of having them with me, but all stuff that will last in the cupboards for a bit – kiddy biscuits that sort of thing. Also got some Tweenies make your own pizzas things, which as Teeny had fallen asleep just as we pulled into the drive Monster made while I put the shopping away. Cooked some garlic bread for their lunch to go with the pizzas and they have both left all the pizza and eaten all the garlic bread – so thats pizza for tea again then!

They are currently both in the lounge watching the Spider video (you know, spider in the bath, spider in the bath, creepy crawly creepy crawly spider in the bath and so on) and dancing around to it. I have taught Monster how to press stop, rewind and play on the video remote too so this could be my most peaceful afternoon ever!

Am just trying to get the next month or so calendared up with stuff. Tomorrow we are meeting a new HE contact, she came on the local email list asking for a 3-6 yo boy to meet and play with her 4 yo shy son, so we are getting together tomorrow in a local park to see how they get on. On Wednesday we are at Rachel’s, Thursday over to Julie’ s and I think I should spend some time with my Mum on Friday as we didn’t see them at all this weekend! Saturday we are going out for a meal with our old nanny and her husband – they are staying in Portsmouth for a week. Very strange to be arranging for my parents to babysit so we can go out with Lynda when for a year we were getting Lynda to babysit when my parents came up so we could go out with them! Then a barbecue at our house on Sunday day which my parents can come to aswell. I have posted on MP about a get together in London at the end of September and Ady has two weeks off in September over our 5th wedding anniversary, Monster’s 4th birthday, a trip to Legoland with Activeo (which we have booked a travelinn for the night before and night after so we can explore Windsor a bit too) and we are debating one or two nights in London too during those two weeks – we really want to do the Natural History Museum, the London Eye and Tussauds, but I might try and persuade my parents to come with us to London.

We are also looking at camper vans at the moment – not sure how it would work exactly but we would love to get one so we can see a bit more of this country on a budget and would possibly consider taking a year or so out in a couple of years when we are a bit straighter financially and travelling abroad in one so would be good to see how we like it.

Anyway, you drive me crazy, julie, merry christmas everyone! which reminds me did anyone ever write to Jim’ll Fix it and what did you ask for?

A lovely day… spent in a rainy garden (not dissimilar to that hanging one, what was it called again?)

Awoken from a very peaceful dream at 4am by the rhythmic chanting of ‘Mummm-meee, Mummm-meee’ via the baby monitor Teeny came into our bed where she proceeded to change positions every two and a half minutes, kick me in the head, manouvere Ady into a quite impressive position where by he required one leg out on the floor and support from the bedside table just to balance was ended at 6am by a tantrum resulting in Monster waking up. Although it was my turn to get up Ady (oh beloved and wonderful husband!) spirited her off, closely followed by Monster where they all played quietly and made some croissants before waking me at 8am so he could crawl back into bed for a bit. Amazingly for us we were out of the house by ten, trying to ignore the drizzly greyness of the day, we stopped at Tescos for barbecue provisions (Chris and Julie are very healthy people, we spend out time corrupting their kids with skips, non organic grapes and chocolate shortbread while they try to encourage ours to ‘just try’ the medley of organic, freshly grown vegetables – guess who’s picnic basket is usually the most popular!) and arrived on time at 11am, to find Julie in a flat spin cos she hadn’t even gotten to the shops, then mightily relieved cos as usual we had brought more than enough food for all of us so she was saved a journey. The blokes stood manlyly round the barbecue, the kids ran round in the rain and me and Julie did womanly stuff (stood in the kitchen half heartedly chopping veg for kebabs, drinking tea and discussing the mini boden catalogue!). Food was lovely, company was nice and it was just a really lovely family day.

Ady took a fair few photos – including loads and vid clips of the four kids lined up running races up and down the garden. He loves photography and he has a good rapport with kids, children’s natural portraits would be a great job for him if he went on a course to get some more techy knowledge, it will go on our list of possible jobs for one day I reckon! Have blogged a few pics from over the weekend. This includes one of Ady, Monster and Teeny all in their Portsmouth FC tops to celebrate their first game of the season. On the way home Ady commented on how well the four kids all get on, they are really at ease in each others company, Teeny can saw both the twins names now and they all looked thrilled to see each other. Its also funny how the two boys always play together in some game involving lots of running, chasing and noise, while the two girls do stuff like wander round holding hands, brushing their hair and pretending to push their babies along in pushchairs together! I probably bang on about this a lot, but Ady had no family upbringing at all and I have only got my brother (we’ve got a couple of cousins from Mum’s brother who we never see, Dad was an only child and the rest of his family are still up in Wales) so its not something either of us have had or taken forgranted till very recently when we started to see Chris and Julie – Julie’s an only child too, and Chris and Ady did have a sister who died a couple of years ago so we are all they have too (although they do see Chris and Ady’ mother a bit) so its just so nice to spend time with each other and see the kids all growing up together, and of course the fact we are all HEing makes it even nicer… ahh contented weekend glow while roast dinner cooks in the over and BB winners show starts soon is making me a bit slushy I think!

Came home via Littlehampton, the weather was too iffy to stop but have earmarked it for a couple of hours, fish and chips and ice cream, walk along the seafront type activity sometime soon, back and Ady’s work car needed washing so I had the bright idea of loading everyone in it and taking it to the carwash which the kids always enjoy. Teeny had the most impressive issue with this which she expressed by going rigid, purple and screaming while I tried to bend her into her car seat and then screaming all the way there till we got inside whereupon she remembered what ‘we are going to the car wash, you love the car wash, please stop screaming and let me do your car seat buckle up, oh for heavens sake would you SHUT UP, KEEP STILL and bloody enjoy being forced into Daddy’s small car just so we can drive you to the car wash PLEASE’ actually meant and was fine all the way through and back home again! Early tea, quick wipe down with babywipes (although really a full bath should have been actioned) and they were both asleep pretty early.

Nice weekend, and nothing planned for tomorrow so we can recover a bit!