I felt quite down this afternoon, which is very not like me and I was listing all the possible reasons for it on a BK post when I realised actually there were sufficient little niggles there to be allowed to feel a bit sad, which cheered me up. Suspect I am like the scarecrow ‘I’d like to be unhappy but I never do have the time’ with a twist of ‘I’d like to be miserable but I never do have the justification!’ . Me and my sodding PMA eh? 😉

I worked this morning, it went quick although I did do a double shift of shelving. I helped a couple of 11 year old girls find books about puberty and periods and couldn’t decide if I admired their maturity for coming and asking at the library and finding books, or if they were winding me up. The whole pre-teen, puberty thing has come up a couple of times lately in various small ways, not specifically to do with Davies and Scarlett but at nearly 10 (eek!) and getting on for 8 that’s the way we’re heading here I guess with it’s whole new set of angst and new stuff to learn about them and me and parenting.

I’m doing a display for some Arts and Crafts books so have created a load of squares on which to do different crafty technique letters to spell out ‘arts and crafts’. I’ve done a pretty mosaic C and a quilled F and am planning on knitting at least one letter and maybe needle felting another, a calligraphy letter, a water colour pretty one, maybe something with plasticine or salt dough, something grafitti style and so on. I did have a go at knitting a T with two pencils and some plastic string but just got lots of pencil lead on my fingers really so gave up.

I got an email with my sign in details for the ECDL the library are paying for me to do. I thought they would change their minds given I have told them I am leaving and they won’t get any benefit out of me qualifying but was told they are viewing it as a thank you for all I’ve done so I can get on with that as I am doing it in my own time accessing it remotely from home. I doubt I’ll actually learn anything new but it’s good to have my computer literacy in a quantifiable measure I guess for potential CVs of the future.

I drove over to Julie’s and had a cup of tea with Chris and Julie while the kids all carried on playing. Maisie and Scarlett had walked home from the allotment on their own so had been lectured about that and when I arrived Davies had a flannel on his eye as Maisie had been flicking nail varnish and it had caught him in the eye 🙁 . I think Wet Play Syndrome had hit over there and five kids, three of whom have all sorts of sibling arguing going on and had infected the others meant it was a bit screechy and rampaging over there. Hurrah for Julie being mostly unfazed by it all though, I know I wouldn’t be!

We left and my poor car went through a puddle too many and died just before we had to cross a railway line. We sat for about five minutes, in a really not very safe place with the hazards on debating whether to call out breakdown cover or give it a few minutes and try and get the engine started. We passed the five minutes by going over my potential action plan if the car had broken down on the crossing which had occured to Scarlett about two minutes after it occured to me so I was able to share my very newly formed ideas. I got the car started again and we then debated the dilemma of it needing petrol (not as desperately as the other day but enough that I wanted to put some in before we got home as I was worried a combination of the steep driveway and more damp would create the same issue next time we try and start it so wanted to discount the petrol element) and deciding whether to stop sooner rather than later so petrol was fine, or get closer to home incase it didn’t start again afterwards. We went for closer to home as the petrol station at Sainsburys is opposite my parents house, only a mile from our house and we’re saving our Nectar points for emergency food rations while we’re WWOOFing so are trying to build them up.

We got there, put petrol in and it started first time to get us home. Suspect my car in damp weather is going to be another ongoing issue for the next couple of months though 🙁

Scarlett was feeling pretty upset because we lost a hen last night. We had 3 hens who had gone broody and would bury themselves into the undergrowth each day and squawk at you when you put them away. Two have been broody for a couple of weeks but a third went broody this week and was very pecky when you grabbed her to put her away. All of the other bantams put themselves away at night, heading into the shed to roost as it starts to get dark, but the broody ones will just stay huddled down where they are. We have at times missed a broody hen when putting them away and have obviously gotten a bit blase about them being pretty safe in their area of the garden.

Last night Ady put them away and despite me having said the night before we now had 3 broody ones and Scarlett saying she’d tried to put that one away and it had pecked her he’d missed her and just put the other two away. This morning when he let them out there was a heap of feathers and a trail of them up past the garage and sure enough she has gone 🙁 . I’m not so upset about the escaped quails flying away as I know they are likely to be okay but having lost 3 hens recently – the speckled one that just disappeared, came back a couple of times but has not been seen for a month now, the broken legged one that died last week and now this one lost to a fox has made me feel most sad 🙁 I’m also worried that the fox will be back and hanging around and Scarlett is just devastated :(. She cried at Julie’s when I confirmed I’d headcounted all the chickens and we’d definitely lost one last night and she cried again at home. I think it’s just too close to the one dying last week for her to be her usual resilient self about it 🙁 Hate seeing my children upset over things I can’t make better for them.

So I wallowed for a bit and then made the kids some tea, Ady came home and the kids and I cuddled up and read the end of The Last Wolf (which nearly made me cry 😉 ) before they went off to bed. I think we all really need a quiet day which is my plan for tomorrow.